41) Fall Apart

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Our love may be slightly superficial and dwindling but it's the closest thing I've felt too human since my mother passed and I'm determined to hold onto it. The way Kolby looks as he trots off the field for halftime is somewhat angelic. A light in my life even though he knows only a fraction of my truth.

"Nope I knew it just wasn't possible," he says to me as he takes my hands to take in my appearance. I'm all done up, complexity glammed out. Make up flawless, every hair perfectly placed, and my dress certainly ways a few tons. Walking it only made harder as my heels sink into the dirt with every step.

"What's not possible?" I ask trying to contain my blushing smile as the fire in his eyes only grows with every passing moment he stays looking at me.

"For you to be more beautiful, even all done up like this. It's theoretically impossible," he says as he takes a star back and continues to check me out.

"So your saying I don't look good?" I say fishing for compliments.

He tugs me in causing and involuntary giggle to escape my lips, "Quiet the opposite in fact." He says as he kisses my forehead.

"Kolby! Get over here now!" Coach Codwell barks from the huddle. He's made but Ashley's keeping him on a tight leash.

The principle lines up all the girls who are up to win formal queen tonight. The band starts to play a slow harmony as the first contestant walks. The closer and closer I near to taking my walk across the hundreds of judging eyes my dress just seems to get heavier. I can only pray that the sequence clinging to my body is enough to distract the crowd from me.

I missed speeches because I was suspended for possession of cocaine. Apparently not giving a speech doesn't matter when the whole town finds out you're a recovering addict turned drug busting detective people seem to talk.

My gaze comes up from the ground of the football field as Ashley and the principal gestures toward me to stand at the beginning of the pathways, preparing for my introduction.

" Wilhelmina Astrix" A voice called over the sea of anticipating bystanders.

Grudgingly I walk down the line of color guard flag twirlers and band members lining the way. When Kolby breaks away from the huddle and seems to just melt at the sight of me. His eyes lighting up as the roam over me making my heart flutter all the while distracting me from the jury who are waiting to tear me apart. He blows me a kiss which touches my heart even from forty yards away.

I focus on him. Everything else seems to fade into a blurring, grumbling seems of background noise. The closer I near to him the lighter my steps seem to feel as I trudge through the thick football field grass.

As quick as sweet bliss and comfort set in though it is pulled away from me. There's a screeching interruption in the band's tune causing my pace to slow. A familiar photo replaces the school's logo on the viewing screens before a voice steps in to clarify everyone's confusion. The photo of me blowing a line in the back garden of my kingdom's annual ball as the chiffon layers of my dress hangs effortlessly off my hips ensures every ounce of color drains from my face.

"You May think she's a wholesome sweet old water girl but our Mina has been hiding a big secret. A big lie." a voice recording of Brooklyn's shrill voice comes over the field's intercom. My eyes immediately search for help. Codwell's face is pale and angry looking when my gaze falls toward his, "Dear Mina, or should I say Princess Asterix has been hiding out in our sleepy little town in a sad attempt to save her crown." As the skeletons are ripped out of my closet in full view of the very people I've been trying to hide them from Ashley rushes to my side, grappling my wrist and pulling me from the field.

The state of shock my mind has fallen into almost numbs the feelings: the pain, the fear, and the heartache. That was until the universe faded out once more. The whispering winds were replaced with an intense ringing pounding shading my ears like a drum. Kolby made no effort to hide his feelings, not that he really could've. His eyes were on the brink of tears and the longer he looked st me the further his shoulders seemed to slump over. Brooklyn's shrill voice pulled us back from one another, her parting statement sticking a hard nail into my coffin, "She came here to improve her image. Dating the smalltown's Prince Charming ensures that. She used every one."

I mouth "I'm sorry" but Kolby's expression just seems to harden. He blinks away a few remnants of emotion before taking off in the crowd. In the sea of people, who are all thrashing about at the revelation seats one calm, sinister soul: Brooklyn. Her grin made it evident, revenge was upon me.

Without any real thought, I take off, trailing him closely behind, ignore Codwell and Ashley's direction. I know with my true identity revealed I'm no longer safe here but none of that matters right now.

"Kolby, please" I yell behind him through the parking lot. I manage to catch up to him as he struggles to find his car keys in his football bag, "Kolby, please just let me explain."

He ripped his hand away from my touch and takes a step back, "Don't, you don't get to do this to me. I trusted you and believed in you and the whole time you were just using me to make yourself look better." He yells back at me. His eyes have a storm brewing and angry and unforgiving storm. I stay quiet taking in his words, each on striking my heart, "I have always accepted exactly who you are. I never question your actions or feelings. I was never fake with you, ever. But you, you are nothing but a liar."

"Kolby it wasn't like that with you, I swear. The me that I am with you is the most alive and honest version of myself I've ever been." I say. The hot tears burn as the roll down my skin.

He lets out a harsh scoff, "That's pretty sad since you weren't honest with me in the slightest. I don't even know you." His words hit me with all the force of a Tsunami. The crashing wave of truth breaking down any grip I have left on my emotions.

I stand there bawling, trying to find the words that may fix this when a spiteful figure appears, "Trouble in paradise?" Chris says as he kisses hit teeth, "Care to comment?" he asks, shoving his recorder in Kolby's face.

He looks between Chris and I and sheiks his head before pulling his truck ford open, "Kolby, please just-" nothing. He seems the door shut, rucks flying up as his tired spin over them. Like that he was gone, leaving me speechless.

I feel Codwell's presence behind me, "Mina, we need to get you out of here." He says resting a comforting hand in my shoulder.

"I drove him away. One of the only people who's ever loved me with no obligation to and I managed to destroy our relationship." I say, my voice shaking as all strength I had vanishes onto thin air.

Codwell wraps his arms around me, pulling me into a hug, "He'll come around."

"Will he?"

Published: 06/22/2019

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Published: 06/22/2019

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