Eight Boys and a Walker girl

30 | Pawn

Please read this chapter all the way through. An important character comes back, and there's also a huge shock at the end :)

30 | Pawn

"So...have the doctors told you anything?"

Me and Mum are currently sat in a weird little cafe called 'Sandy's'- literally the first place selling coffee and food we could find in this part of the city near to Jamie's hospital. She wasn't planning to come back, but as I was leaving the Seacole ward two hours ago, she intercepted me by the hospital entrance, saying she'd come to see me home safely. I know what it really was- she didn't want to be away from Jamie. She knows I could easily take a bus home myself.

When I suggested food and caffeine, she didn't object. I've never really comfort-eaten, but right now, I seriously think only something exceptionally high in sugar, marshmallows and cocoa could cheer me up. Mum orders a black coffee, which I've never understood when you can have a caramel macchiato, and I order a caramel macchiato and marshmallow fridge cake, which is like a slice of heaven on earth. While we wait for our food to be brought to us by the waiters in their cute, funny, red-and-white checkered aprons, Mum drums her fingers on the table-top, almost as if she's afraid to talk to me.

"Weather's nice, isn't it?" she smiles at me, lips stretched just a little too wide. I roll my eyes, knowing that she's heard my question.

"Mum, what did the doctors tell you about J? They must've told you what they think about his chances right now. They can't just- leave us hanging, can they?"

"I've heard it's going to rain tomorrow," Mum says. "I'll have to look through the loft for that umbrella if rainy season's deciding to start early."

If we weren't in a quaint little coffee shop, I swear I'd have slammed my fists down on the table. "Mum, I want to know about-"

"Oh, give me break, Evvie!" she groans, running her hands down her face, stretching her cheeks downwards. "I'm trying so hard not to break down right now, can't you see?"

I fold my arms and glare her out.

Finally, she sighs, rolling her eyes as she lays her palms flat down on the table before her. "You already know the condition they admitted him int hospital in, Ev. You know they've been telling us there isn't much chance."

"But- but hospitals are supposed to make you better, right? They'll make him better, won't they? They have to!" my voice rises with panic, and I have to force my breathing to be even and regular before I have another panic attack.

Mum sighs again. "Yes, that's the job of a hospital."

"So they'll make Jamie better, right?"

"Evvie! I have no idea!" she cries in exasperation. "The doctor- she told me that they'll call me in today at 4 o'clock, which is in an hour's time, and let me know the verdict. We'll know in an hour what happens to Jamie, okay? Now leave me alone!"

I'm too stunned to even argue with her, as I usually would. One hour. That's the space between now, and when I find out whether or not my older brother will be in the rest of my life. In a space of sixty minutes, the doctors will be able to tell my mother whether or not he'll get better- or whether or not he'll have died because of me. Every time I think about that last bit, I feel my stomach churning. I feel like such a criminal for keeping my mouth shut- but the little, nervous part of me that desperately doesn't want to be hated by my mother and family for the rest of my life makes me keep quiet.

If he-doesn't live- I'll tell Mum. If he doesn't live, I'll come clean. I'll have to, because otherwise I'll be living as a killer for the remainder of my life.