All of this past

Back in the past

I smiled at the note that Liam had left on his pillow for me when I woke up.

Hey Haz. I've taken Sam out for the afternoon (sleepy head!) and Jude's off to Gemma's New Years-family lunch. She was a nervous wreck, by the way, though it wasn't exactly the first time she's going there. Kate's at home but she'll be mostly practising guitar, or that's what she told me before I left. Not sure when I'll be home, but I left you mac&cheese in the fridge. Your favourite comfort food, right? Hope the hangover isn't too bitchy and you had great fun last night. Love you Hazzzzz. Love, Li.

He was right, mac and cheese was my favourite type of comfort food, and it happened to be a perfect remedy for the nasty headache that was annoying the hell out of me. I got out of bed, slowly not to evoke any nausea or more pounding in my skull and into the shower before I trudged downstairs into the kitchen to find the yumminess that Liam had left me. Yesterday was New Years eve, and I'd been out celebrating with some of my stage and studio crew, it had kind of become a tradition and I didn't want to ditch them. So after I'd watched the fireworks with Liam and the kids, I'd gone out into town to celebrate, and drink an awful lot of beers and god knows what else. As long as it was alcoholic, it had been fine.

I'd been spending most of last week at Liam's, mostly only going home to get fresh clothes and feed the cats, and he had given me the key to his house for last night so I could come back and sleep here when I was done partying. Which was around 5am. I kind of regretted it now though, feeling shitty as I did, but it had been a good time, and I was glad Liam had given me the time and space to wake up slowly and get the hangover out the door before I had to deal with any loudness.

I was curled up on the couch, watching I don't even know what TV show with my microwaved mac and cheese, the headache finally dying down after the painkiller-cocktail I had taken half an hour before. The food was delicious, and it was just everything I needed to feel better, and very much alive again. My mood was improving drastically, and I felt actually quite cheery by the time my plate was empty. Although I could've eaten more, as usual when I had mac and cheese.

"Harry?"

I looked up to see Kate leaning against the doorframe. She had a serious expression on her face, not that strange for her, although I'd found her happier and more carefree lately.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, do you need help with your guitar playing?" I had given her my old guitar a few days ago, since I had a new one now anyway, and she had been playing it incessantly ever since.

"No, I just wanted to talk to you about something."

"Oh. Okay. Have a seat."

I watched her as she sat down on the other end of the sofa, leaning against the armrest and crossing her legs in front of her as she leant her elbows on her knees, her chin resting in her palms. She resembled Liam so much when she sat like that, even though she was physically the spitting image of David.

"I... How... When... How did you know you liked boys as well?"

I was taken aback by her question. It was not that I didn't want to answer it, but to be honest, I needed to think about it myself, and I hadn't been expecting this kind of question.

"I...I'm actually not sure. Why are you asking?"

She let out a sigh and rubbed her face before she looked at me again. "I'm confused Harry. I'm just so confused. And I had hoped you'd be able to help out, since you like both girls and boys..."

A small smile crossed my lips as I thought about it. "I just knew, I suppose. It just happened actually. I never gave much thought to it, but I just knew with my first boyfriend."