Waiting can sometimes be painful.
Waiting for my mother to come back over was hard, waiting for the plane to come over here was harder, but, waiting for what Zayn has to say been the hardest. I know that if he isn't ready for this, I'll crumble all the same.
I sit in the wooden swing out in the side yard. It's slightly hidden away behind some bushes and the tree it hangs from. The wind is nonexistent and the only sounds around are the soft sound of crickets emerging from the evening dew and the distant sound of cars driving in the distance.
I just want to know what he's going to say. Is he going to call this off like I've been questioning or is he going to reassure me? I know he wants to be with me, but to get married so soon is crazy to me. If I don't marry him, I'll have to go back home. If I do marry him, I'll force us to have our own home.
As I think, I hear the front door open and close, knowing Zayn is coming over. When he sees me, he puts on no particular look and brings his hands out of his pockets when he sits down.
Say anything — just say something — is all I plead in my mind.
"So, this is it... not even a day more and we'll be married..." he says, making me feel a little uneasy.
I don't know what I want from him anymore. I feel like I've been walking back and forth between wanting this endlessly to shying away from it entirely. I wish it were easier than this.
"Do you want to marry me? I mean... do you want to marry me now?"
His question burns on my tongue. Honestly... no. I don't want to marry him now. I want to be with him, yes. But to marry him so soon feels wrong. Dating him has been great and I want to continue. But I know I have to marry him if I want to continue any of this.
"I want to be with you... but... marrying you..."
"You don't want to?"
"Someday I do, but it feels so soon."
"I don't want you to feel like you have to. You don't need to marry me. As much as I'd love to marry you, I know it's so soon."
"I just feel like I'm not ready for any of this. We just met not long ago or, at least, it feels like it hasn't been that long ago."
"It really wasn't that long ago... I understand if you don't want to. I just wanted to know." He looks down at his hands, seeming to be hurting at the moment. "But I want you to know that I want you to - marry me, I mean. I know it's soon and strange but, to me, it feels right."
His confession makes me feel better. Perhaps my worry that he wasn't ready made me worry that I wasn't.
"I... I'm going to, though. I'm going to marry you." I tell him.
"But... you said you didn't want to."
"I would have preferred if it was at a later time... so we'd have more time to get to know each other. But, I know that we need to try. We're good for each other, you and I. I feel like this could be good for both of us."
"Yeah..." He smiles, clearly very happy with my answer. "... I think so too."
I know everything is happening so quickly and I've never been one to believe in fate, but I know that leaving now would be a huge mistake — one I don't want to make.
"In that case..." Zayn says, moving off of the swing and onto one knee. "Would you do me the honour of being my wife?" He asks, opening up a small box with a small ring inside.
The ring didn't have any diamonds on it but instead had something engraved on it.
-- Spend forever with me
"Yes," I smile uncontrollably, "I will."
He smiles, rising up to place the ring on my finger.
"I'm glad. We're gonna make this work. This is right."
YOU ARE READING
Sometimes | z.m.Romance
ROMANCE | "Sometimes things change." A marriage arranged to help her start a new life has left Isabelle and Zayn stuck in the middle of a relationship neither of them are enjoying. In the beginning, this marriage wasn't meant to be about love, rathe...