27. If We Make It

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{Present Day}(Isabelle's POV)

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{Present Day}
(Isabelle's POV)

I remember that night at the lake so vividly — the way he confessed his feelings to me so openly. I was so unsure at first. I didn't know if it would last. I didn't know if he knew what he was getting himself into.

I guess things worked out didn't they?

It wasn't easy, of course. We didn't immediately fall in love, or really come close to being in love quickly. The first few months of 'dating' was strange. It felt weird. It didn't feel wrong but it definitely felt out of the ordinary. Then again, I guess our whole situation was far from ordinary.

When I look at him now, it's hard to still see that person — the one who whole heartedly admitted his love for me. We're both so different now. He doesn't say what he means and neither do I. We just keep tip-toeing around each other, waiting for an explosive argument to erupt.

I know he still loves me, to some degree. And after all that he's done for me — I should love him too — I do love him. I'm just not myself anymore.

"Isa?" His voice speaks from the doorway of the bedroom.

There he stands, tall and somewhat somber looking. He always has that undertone of sadness in his expression. I always take it for disappointment, but maybe, this isn't what he expected from all of this, just as I hadn't.

"Yeah?"

"I'm-uh... going out for a bit... do you need anything?"

He always asks that... if I need anything. Why have I never noticed that before?

"Um... no, I'm good... thank you." I smile before looking back to the side table blankly.

"Is something wrong? You feeling okay?" He asks while stepping into the room further. "You've been in bed all day."

"I'm fine." I smile again. "Just... tired."

"...okay..." he mumbles before leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.

I'm fine. I really am... I just... I don't know what to do. Things will never go back to the way they were in the beginning. It's nice to think about and when I recreated the first date it was nice but, I can't recreate every memory and live in it as if I haven't already.

Sometimes I just wonder if there are better memories to come... or if we'll be forever reminiscing.

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