Dogs

3.

Youngjae

The days crawled pass, the nights zooming by as JB recovered for the 3 months. I felt so empty during the day, without him by my side, missing him more than ever.

Jinyoung looked so tortured looking after all of us, especially whenever we got too rowdy that he kept sending quiet pleading looks to Mark and I. We both laughed about it, joining around with the maknaes at times but stepping up only when it became way too noisy.

I fled back to the dorm faster than Mark on most days, the two of us making it look like a competition on who entered the van to head back first.

I loved going back to a kitty JB, seeing him sprawled out while reading a book, the only difference was if he was facing the ceiling or downwards.

He would always ask me about my day and about practice, watching the videos I took for him. He would comment about the moves and look so absorbed, skimming over the details of his physiotherapy when I asked him.

I asked our manager about it as well but he shrugged, keeping quiet about it as well. It made me more worried and curious than ever, and I itched to find out more.

~

I decided to sneak out of practice on his physiotherapy day, wanting to just know how he is.

I pulled my cap down and face mask up, hiding as much of my face as I could while I made my way to the hospital.

I had no idea which room he was in but simply followed my tingly senses, spotting a room which was guarded by some security.

I lowered my mask and bowed at them, recognising a few of them.

"Hi. I'm just here to take a look. Please don't let them know" I smiled.

They nodded back at me, making way for me to go pass. I stood at the door and watched him through the crack, my hands curling into fists by my sides.

He's in pain. I almost snapped and rushed in when I saw him fall, our manager catching him in time while JB scrunched his eyes shut.

It's been more than a month... has he been suffering the whole time?

My heart ached so badly, seeing him struggling and pushing himself like that. I left quickly after that, not wanting to breakdown and get caught.

I thanked the guards again, telling them to keep it a secret before going back to our company building.

I was distracted throughout the rest of practice, unsure of how I was going to face him that night. How do I even help him?

~

"You're back" JB smiled, looking up from his book when I entered.

"Yeah" I smiled back before turning away, trying to hide the worry.

"I'm going to shower" I mumbled, quickly rushing out to the toilet before he could ask me anything.

I dragged my feet back to our room, coming in to see JB propped up against the wall while he watched my every move.

"Jae" he called out and I froze, keeping my gaze on our towels.

"Hmm?" I hummed, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Turn around"

"I'm hanging this up" I quickly reply, my body finally responding as I spread my towel.

"You saw... didn't you" he sighed. I kept my lips shut but felt the tips of my ears flush at getting caught, turning around to his eyes shut.

His annoyed jaw was out and he ran his hand through his hair, his eyes snapping open to look at me, his sharp eyes seeing right through me.