Journey To Rabbit Hole

Part 41 ( Family; Home )

Forth's POV

I have seen Beam in his worse stated. Every  time i heard him crying i felt like i am dying inside. To remember he often cried in my embraces. Before it was for reason that i never know. But i now i knew it. I feel dejected about myself...i have failed to see the wounded been on him all this time. Behind his beautiful smile he hide he was hurted. All i did looking for him on my side. All i did was for me that once i thought it was for us. And all he did to make me happier.

How can i take a longer time to realized?. I take so much time to finally know and it was never too late. I started to see on his side too. I see him now, Baramee Vongviphan, the true color of him. The real Beam.

I once promised him i would stayed with him and going through with every thick and thin. Now i don't want to promise anything...but i will be there beside him. Extend him hand when he fall and rise. Offer him my shoulder when he feel like to cry and happy.  Be there when he need a warm hugs. Be there when he need to let out his feeling, his thoughts. Listen to him more. Be there for him.

Don't want to draw the line between us; but to still respect his space and giving him time. To be true with him...as his best friends.

***

I pick Beam up,  like i said to him yesterday.  15 Minutes  before 9 am i arrived at Aunt's place. I park my car at the lobby; waiting and pick up area.

I can't tell him i already arrived, we haven't asked each other new phone number. I guess it will take much more time till before we can text each other like a friends.

I am glad to be here today with him. I know he is missing his mother. He hold it well for damn a week to finally bursted his tears yesterday. I am glad he can be honest with himself.

While i keep contemplating over what had happened, the knocked on the window surprised me. It is Beam, ah... i forgot i locked the doors.

I get out from the car, we both said " Morning. " to greet each other. I saw him bring the travel bag that he often used. Being optimistic  as i am, i think i bring enough clothes to stay over.

I think my lips without no shamed form a big silly smile. Sigh... i think i over thinking now.  We are best friend. Fuck!. Why the heck my brain begin to cracked in the early morning to think nonsense, the thought that was not supposed too.

He wear that white shirt with V shape with black jean. Seriously Beam?? I can see your milky skin right away now.  Gulp. Should i remind him that he need some jacket to cover it?.

But fuck Yeah...Maybe i should feed my hungry eyes.

Then i heard he chuckled...did he found me checking him out?. I hope he don't think too much though.

With awkward smile i take his bags put it on the back seat together with mine. I mentality slapped myself, this journey is not a vacation. I am not a pervert. I refused you all to see me that way.

While i reconstruct and fix my dirty mind, Beam said  " We going to Pattaya... err...we might stay over. I hope you don't mind. " He talk while he fixed his black glasses, again my mind drooling over him.

I nods and focused on drive " I don't mind. Beam... I am glad to come with you. So count on me na.   " He nods back to me. I know he pretty nervous now to meet with her after  months. I taps his hand lightly so he can be more relax. I guess i can finally more relax too.

It was not very long journey, it just  take 45 minutes go to the main city from campus,  there we were going to the southeast, Pattaya city that would take probably more than 2 hours to arrive. If we stop at the rest stop,  it could take more than 3 hours and half in total to reach the destination.