Breaking free (GxG)

Chapter 18 - Mini golf

"Excuse me? You did what?", my therapist asked and raised her eyebrows in anger. I sighed shamefully and looked down to avoid her gaze because I was on the verge of bursting into tears.

"I don't even know what came over me, Alexandra. I'm so stupid!", I exclaimed frustratingly and covered my face with my hands to hide myself.

"Have you at least called her to tell her you left without her?", she asked blankly so I looked up to meet her eyes and I didn't even need to answer to her. By the way she sighed and shook her head, I knew I'd screwed up big. Very big.

"The worst thing is that I'm hurting her, I'm hurting myself, and I'm hurting our relationship and I don't know how I came up with that stupid idea. I wasn't even thinking."

"What about your mother? Did she tell you anything about your spontaneous action?", Alexandra asked tilting her head in curiosity.

"She kept on telling me that it was a mistake and asking me why I was leaving so bluntly but I completely flicked her off", I answered truthfully while shaking my head in lack of understanding.

"Brooke, you need to fix this whole situation", she said firmly.

"I will", I whispered and nodded my head determinedly.

Alexandra announced the end of our session so we both stood up and instead of the usual shake of hands, she wrapped her arms around my shoulders and gave me some comfort and courage. That's how I interpreted it and felt it. She was giving me her whole support and telling me 'Go girl!'.

The whole drive home was a blur. I don't even know how I made it to my destination without crashing or killing some pedestrian. My focus was on one particular brunette and not on the road at all. I was crying, thinking, imagining and talking to myself sometimes, reminding me at loud of the miserable human being that I was. I didn't even bother parking in the garage, I just got out of my car, climbed up the stairs and made my way to my room while the only sound I could hear was the resonance of my own sobs.

"You left me", a voice startled me as soon as I stepped into my room and made me jolt up in surprise.

"Taylor", I whispered as if I couldn't believe it. Taylor. Sitting on my bed. Looking like a freaking goddess with her tight black dress and high heels and sporting her most serious expression.

"Come here", she demanded in a firm voice and I legit felt my limbs shivering at the coldness of her tone.

I closed the door mechanically, dropped my purse on the floor and approached the bed hesitantly before sitting down next to her, making sure to keep my head down to avoid her gaze. A big silence settled between us. I was frozen. I didn't know what to do or say and I was thinking, looking for something, anything that could justify my deed but I had nothing. Nothing to say about the fact that I'd left my girlfriend in Los Angeles and came back without her, without even telling her about it.

"It's not how things work, Brooke", Taylor said in a soft voice.

I got taken aback by the gentleness she was putting in her words. So taken aback that I raised my head and met her blue eyes, getting completely mesmerized by their beauty.

"You left me first", I blurted out and felt my eyes watering but did nothing to control them. I had nothing to hide from her.

"I was mad", she simply said.

"And I was hurting", I retorted in a shaky voice and focused back on my feet. They were interesting.

"You want to know what I did? I left because I went to see my sister, yesterday. And you know what I told her? To go fuck herself and to get the hell out of my life! I did that because she texted me saying that she's the one who called the paps on us. I did that because I'm so fucking in love with you that I don't give a shit if I have to lose my sister for you! But I came back and you were gone, Brooklyn. You weren't simply locked in a room or gone for a walk. You fucking took a plane and left me there!"