Write Me A Letter

02 | h i d e

CHAPTER TWO | H I D E     

ALEXANDER WAS THE ONE with a hangover, but it was Brie who felt like hell. They were both in their American Government class with Izzy Fence while they waited for Ms. Fernandez's return. A good chunk of the students was either sleep-deprived from attending the party or socially deprived of not being invited. Brie was neither, really. She wasn't invisible, but she didn't like loud music. She was more of an acoustic and alternative rock gal than a pop enthusiast so going out with people who enjoyed dark places and loud music wasn't her thing.

She much rather stay in her treehouse.

So it was basic common sense: she shouldn't feel bad for not attending the party after Izzy's lousy invitation during lunch last week. It was obvious how she only wanted to invite the guys but thought better of it and extended the invite to her, Paula and Jean.

Brie could still even hear the sound of Izzy's voice inside her head that day while she munched on a bland spoonful of mac n' cheese, "uh, you girls can come too if you like. It's a bit late, but yeah."

Nope, Brie was good. She didn't need to squeeze herself in Izzy's life.

But now looking at how much Xander was trying to smile at Izzy despite the obvious headache was making her feel uneasy. It was obvious that both of them developed something that was a bit deeper than what Brie liked. Xander wasn't a touchy person, but now, he had the guts to touch Izzy's elbow. Maybe she should've just attended the damn party, or better yet, maybe she should've just told Xander to stay at home.

As if he'd listen, Brie told herself, rolling her eyes. He probably wouldn't want anything to do with her after what she did the other day.

The stupid confession and the stupid letter that now laid heavy inside her faded purple Herschel backpack. She wanted to crawl inside her own sweatshirt and stay there for the rest of her life.

What was she even thinking? Oh right. She wasn't. Her heart took the wheel and drove straight to the edge of the cliff while her brain malfunctioned. A perfect catastrophe.

"No way!" Izzy's laugh made Brie lookup. The girl had her eyes turned wide, her pink-glossed lips stretched into a big smile. Brie sighed. "You like Green Day, too? They're my favorite!"

Oh? Brie didn't know whether to laugh, scoff or cry. Green. Fucking. Day? Was he kidding her? That was her favorite band. He liked dub-step music, R&B, and rap. There was no single day in their friendship that Xander appreciated her taste in music. Was he really that desperate to impress Izzy?

Xander's response was to smirk as if he did something relatively impressive. "Oh, yeah. Gotta love them. What's your favorite song?"

"Twenty-one Guns!" Izzy almost jumped in her seat. Brie flinched. That was her song with her dad, the one they always sang together, voices loud and out of tune before he passed away. Brie would be okay if Izzy said something like When I Come Around or Hitchin' a Ride. That she was okay with; that Izzy could have.

But please, not that song. 

The pretty brunette dragged her chair closer to Xander, making half of the class coo and holler. She shut them up with a roll of her eyes and a flick of her hand. A lingering echo of snickers and chuckle remained; almost leftovers of the sound of enthusiasm, but it still left Brie feeling nauseous.

"How about you, what's your favorite?"

"Uh." It was automatic, like magnets finding their opposites. His dark brown eyes easily found her unamused ones and by the way he subtly pulled at the collar of his Supreme T-shirt, Brie knew that he needed her help. The question was though, would she give in just like she always did?

Xander shifted in his seat, slightly twisting to face Brie's direction. She didn't miss his signal: two quick taps on his jean-clad knee.

"He loves Hitchin' a Ride," Brie said, making heads turn to where she sat in the back of the class, including Xander's. Right, of course. She'd give in and help the idiot, and now she wanted to shrink further in her seat.

"Oh?" Izzy raised her brow and sat back. Her neon pink nails traced the edge of her smirk. She looked really pretty today with her long brown hair in waves and signature cat-eye liners. "Is that so?"

It wasn't stated, but it was lingering on every letter. Pick. One. Brie's stomach tightened. She wasn't ready for another rejection. She just got her heart broken by the same guy yesterday. She didn't need more bruises.

The rest of the room watched in silent anticipation. Yet Brie could hear their loud voices in her head. Some were rooting for her, while a good majority taunted her presence. She kept saying Xander's name in her head, repeating each syllable until they were all jumbled in an indecipherable drawl. Maybe she was a psychic that was yet to be discovered, and by saying his name, he'd agree with her.

Say Hitchin' a Ride. Say it. Don't ruin Twenty-one Guns for me.

"I like Twenty-one Guns the best," he said and Brie's already broken heart started to pulverize. "But Hitchin' a Ride is great too. Uh, I like them both."

Brie pretended not to see Simon—Xander's best friend—from the corner of her teary eye. He was staring at her, lips pursed and dark blue eyes steady. He knew. Xander probably already told him.

Izzy was silent, but her eyes couldn't hide her satisfaction. She won. He picked her. Nevermind that the song held a heavy sentimental value to her and was probably just another song to Izzy. Then, she chuckled and poked his arm. "I always knew we'd get along."

He shook his head, laughter escaping his lips. He looked like he belonged there—a crowd of people with a loud taste in music and a love for laser lights. With his almond-shaped eyes and dimples, he sure did. No wonder why Izzy Fence liked him. He was just someone a girl could easily fall for. Charming smile, jet-black hair and soft brown eyes, Alexander Liu was really a token.

But he was more than just a token to Brie. She could see past the impressive I.Q and booming family business. He was more than just the Mathematician and child prodigy to her. He wasn't just that cute, Chinese-American guy from her class who played basketball. No, he was Xander. The first guy who ever hugged her so tight, the first guy who ever made her feel like a woman.

He was the first person who ever saw her. Or maybe, she was just delusional. Maybe her feelings were playing tricks with her memories. Because if she really did matter to him in some way—no matter how irrelevant—Brie would've felt it. She would've known, and best of all, he wouldn't be there, sitting right next to Izzy Fence.

For a split second, he glanced at her. Just a quick look with his lips pursed. She knew he was sorry, and that he was guilty. But Brie knew better. He could feel bad for embarrassing her, for letting Izzy who also took his heart take away a song that mattered to her so much. But he was more than happy to please Izzy.

Ms. Fernandez entered the room with a sigh, and the class began to shuffle back to their seats. Xander's eyes snapped back to where it belonged—in front. Brie's fingers curled into her sweatshirt, letting the soft fibers fill the gaps. And just like that, she was forgotten again.

Izzy was no queen-bee, Brie wasn't a nerd and Xander was definitely not a jock with a six-pack. However, in this love story, she was the outsider, and that truth hurt even more.