Ashes to Ashes (BDTW #3)

Chapter 23

It was complete mayhem. 

With a gun strapped to my side, and three knives hidden all over my body, I sprinted from building to building and assessed, evaluated, contemplated. There were hundreds of bodies, all marching, dressed in clothing of all colours: on one distinct side were the loyal Dauntless, and from what I could see were the Amity that had joined the fight which managed to shock me to my core, and the other were the mind controlled, simulation bound bodies following every command Erudite fed to them. 

There were two entrances that I knew of: the main one (which was currently being blocked by a sea of gunshots and fighting people) or the trash chute, which wasn't really an entrance. And that's when I knew that I definitely should have planned this better. 

I had no time to think around this. I steeled my nerves and took deep breaths, pressed against the brick wall, and clutched the gun strapped to my waist. I slowly lifted it out of its holster, testing its weight, its familiarity a comfort to my fingers. Though I hadn't held it in such a long time, it felt as though it were an extension of my body. The feeling was terrifying yet also satisfying. 

Without another thought, I plunged into the crowd. I needed to make it to that main entrance, and from there, I could try to retrace my way back to the upper levels. I somewhat learned how they laid out their building during my two unwanted stays here. 

People were coming at me from all sides, clawing, punching grabbing. All I could hear were the guttural growls, screams of pain, cries of battle and deafening blasts of gunshots being fired at such close distance. Many people dropped and the tangy smell of blood filled the air. I couldn't look down without resisting the urge to gag. 

I fended people off one after the other keeping my eyes only on the main entrance standing twenty feet away from me. Somebody decked me to the ground, and as I looked up a blank-eyed Candor woman raised her fist to punch me square in the eye. I kicked her square in the chest and pried her off of me, sending her flying a few feet back, and quickly scraped myself off the concrete and sprinted to the doors. I ducked as I heard a shot being fired then looked up to see it had almost sliced clean through my skull. 

My hands clutched the handle and tugged the door open instead of risking jumping through the cracked glass of bullet-ridden glass doors. Inside the building wasn't much better. There were Dauntless traitors everywhere fighting people dressed in all colours. The roar of the crowd was ear splitting. I couldn't stick around here, and luckily, I knew exactly where I was going. 

Sprinting to the left, I found block A, where I remembered most of the rooms were labeled as. I burst through the door to the stairwell and strained my ears, trying to identify any sounds, and heard nothing. Swiftly, I began climbing the stairs, gun poised lowly in my hands, ready to be fired at the slightest threat. The only sound was the thundering of my footsteps trying to keep up with my steady heartbeat. 

I didn't even know if Eric was even going to be up here. This was all chance, all a guessing game, an ill-planned revenge plot. For a second, my footsteps faltered at how stupid I was being, how reckless and irresponsible this all was, then shook my head, thinking that if I died, I would get what I've wanted. Apparently, in this world, homicide is a lot more acceptable than suicide. 

Jesus Christ, I thought to myself, stop. You have people that care. You have people that care. 

But my chest ached, because something within me always failed to believe it. 

After six stories, the stairs came to a stop. It was a just a large blue painted door with a small rectangular keypad on the side. The light flashed red. I tried pushing on the door. Nothing.