LOOK AT ME (13)

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This is probably the shortest chapter I have ever wrote. About 1200 words. Sorry it's not that long but I'm the bright side, u get a new update tomorrow :)
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I was by my locker the next morning, minding my business.

Fatima has been very supportive of my decision. She thinks I should go along with what I had come to conclusion just yesterday.

Avery still hasn't bothered me but I'm not going to jump to the end and pretend like she was going to leave me alone the whole day. We all know she won't.

That snake always finds a way to slither herself back into my life.

I was picking out my books for math class which was right now. I couldn't wait to get into class so I can ignore the fuck out of those two. Those two being Ahmed and Avery.

Am I the only one that gets excited to be petty? I literally can't wait to be rude for once. This is going to be fun.

As soon as I slammed my locker shut, I saw a familiar tall, lean and handsome body stand beside my locker.

New kid.

Ahmed was leaning his back against other lockers as he stood there, facing me but not looking at me. As soon as I realized it was him, my eyes jolted to the floor.

You think you are the only one that can play that game? Well you aren't. Hello, my name is Emerald and I'm a participant in this new game I call hell.

Bitch.

He was confused and I know it. I was lowering my gaze too. Who said you had to be Muslim to do this shit? Watch me be a professional Muslim. I'm going to be a better Muslim than you ever was.

"Hi?" He said rather awkwardly.

He pretty fucking stupid if he thinks I'm going to talk first.

I stared at the ground. Wow, I didn't even realize how clean the floor actually was until I stared at it right now. I can almost see my reflection.

He wasn't wearing my sweater today, I see. It's cool, he'll wear it again eventually.

"I just wanted to make something clear." He cleared his throat, "Whatever Avery said yesterday is just. . ." He gulped, like he couldn't even believe he's saying this.

I stayed quiet, impatiently tapping my foot. Don't tell me he's trying to apologize. Him, really? Why is he apologizing? He didn't do anything wrong besides pick the wrong girl.

"It was stupid and. . . She shouldn't have said that. To be honest I don't think you're any of those things." He shoved his hands in his pockets and shifted around on his spot.

My hands were folded across my chest, the usual position. The heart melting Emerald would freak out about this weird Ahmed version of an apology but this angry and petty Emerald couldn't give two shits.

He wants to play like a bitch? I got you.

"And Just because I stayed silent yesterday doesn't mean I agree with her. You aren't. . . Fat or annoying and stupid."

I wanted to look up, my god I really did. I wonder how hot he looked when he's trying to apologize. I wonder how cute his hair is and how much his jaw is clenching. Yeah I'm bipolar. Being a professional Muslim should pay because this shit is just too hard.

But that reminds me.

"I thought you said you weren't a fan of bullying?" I was serious. I almost felt like I was going to tear up or something.

He defended me all those times, except this time.

"I'm not."

"Then?"

Why did it feel like I expected him to help me yesterday? She didn't even bully me with her fist yet. She only talked about me in a rude manner that made me cry.

Speaking of crying, I wanted to do that right now.

"Look I'm just apologizing on her behalf."

What the fuck did he just say?

I gaped at the floor but it was meant for him, "You think if that bitch wanted to apologize, she would've done it herself?"

"Emerald—"

"Fuck You."

I was mad for no reason. He's always helping me and I've been more than appreciative but come on, put yourself in my shoes. If someone claims to avoid you because of their religion but then ends up doing the exact same things to someone else, you would be pissed off too right?

I already began walking away. He couldn't even apologize on his own behalf?

"Emerald I don't even know you like that!" He shouted behind me, and I came to a stop.

He finally got my attention and that apparently meant he can talk his crap.

He was right.

But what about Avery? Does he know her like that?

I turned around furiously, "Yet you always help me. Yet I helped you that one time! We might not know each other that well Ahmed but we are familiar with each other more than ever."

He tensed up at my response.

I walked towards him, not caring if people were watching us and recording this. I hope someone did.

"No one has ever stood up for me the way you did." Here come the tears, I can feel them coming, "You don't know me like that but every time I get into a fight with Avery, you are always there to stop it. To defend me."

When he kept his eyes on the floor and clenched his jaw, I leaned into his ear so I can say a few words he might not want me to say in front of everyone, "And when you were at your breaking point I just happened to be there to help you too. I gave you my sweater, gave you a pair of shoes for free, and I can't even get something as little as a glance from you."

His eyes softened as his gaze remained away from me, "I can't." He croaked out. His voice cracked when he spoke.

What does he mean he can't?

I leaned away from his ear and stood back, tightening my hoodie around my head. Strands of my curly jet black hair began to stick out from all the action I've been pulling.

He has no idea how much he's put me through. I went through Fatima's dad to learn how to bond with him, get to him. I tried to get him to look at me but every time he just seems to go further ma further away from me.

"I don't know if it's because of what I look like." I pointed at my face, "Or how weird I am. Maybe you don't look at me because of how I dress of how I'm a freak or whatever that living scum bag told you."

He didn't do anything but breathe and that pissed me the fuck off.

"You tense up whenever I touch you." I put my hand on his arm and he instantly flexed.

I smiled sadly, "See."

He removed his arm away from my touch as he slowly walked backwards.

"It May seem like we don't know each other at all," my heart just beat so much faster because I had really just done what I had done, "But truth, we have a lot in common."

And that was it before I walked away.

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