Best Friends

April 28, 2026

Sarah

I felt the anxiety lift from me when I heard him cry. That cry meant he was alive. My mother's stillborn miscarriage had been haunting my dreams. It was so easy to harm these tiny lives.

Kyle laid him down in my arms. It was like the pain was gone. I was still crying, but was made numb by the baby boy before me.

"I did it." I whispered. "You did it." I directed at him.

"Would you like for me to fetch some formula?" The nurse asked.

I shook my head. "I'll feed him."

"What here?" Kyle asked. "Now?"

I laughed. "Of course." I said getting ready.

"Wait til I leave!" He backed up.

"Whatever. I'm only feeding him. See? You can't even see anything." Another piece of anxiety left. He had a good strong suck. I wouldn't need to worry about him not getting enough nutrients.

Kyle relaxed a little, and I saw his fascination written plainly on his face.

"Samantha never let you watch her nurse, did she?" I asked.

"No. She only nursed Jessica for a few weeks, then switched to formula. DIdn't like the feeling or something."

"Hmmm." I stroked his head. I wanted to be sad for Kyle, for the kids, but I couldn't think about it very hard.

"What are you going to name him?" Kyle asked.

"I don't know yet." I said. "Joe said he had some ideas, but wanted to surprise me..."

He nodded. "Why not name him after Joe?"

I shook my head. "I'm not that cruel. I'm not naming my son after his dead father. It would upset me to call his name, it would follow him forever like a ghost. I loved Joe, I did, but I'll respect his memory by thinking of this little guy first and foremost. He'd have wanted it that way."