[Completed]: (8/3/18)
Ranks: #1 in lawbreaker (11/21/18)
Definition of bad (adj)
bad[ bad ]
of poor quality:below an acceptable standard in quality or performance
unskillful:lacking the skill or competence to perform a task adequately
not functioni...
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Chapter 33
Song: Ben Howard- Promise
Warning: mental illness and suicide is mentioned.
Kristen Pov.
When I wake up, I reach for my phone to text Jesse.
Kristen: Can I come over?
He takes a few minutes to reply
Jesse: yeah sure... why?
I roll my eyes. Of course he would question why.
Sometimes boys could be so oblivious.
Kristen: I just wanna talk.
I step out onto the balcony to see that Jesse is standing there. I reach for his extended hand to help myself over to his part of the balcony.
Once I'm over the railing, he wraps his arms around me and pulls me in for a lift kiss on the lips. We make our way into his room and I sit on his bed with a sigh.
"So... what did you wanna talk about?" He asks nonchalantly.
"About yesterday. I don't know what-" he cuts me off.
"You don't have to try to explain your stress to me. It's fine. I mean I can completely relate; Just thinking about college and being away from you makes me stressed- and scared." He shrugs his shoulders. He never looks me in the eye while saying all of this.
"Who's to say we won't be near each other?" I try to reason with him knowing damn well that we would probably have to do a long distance relationship.
"So you're saying that we could both potentially live in California or Massachusetts together. That's just unrealistic thinking. I won't ask you to settle anywhere just because of me. Hat would be a dick move on my part." He shakes his head.
"Well I'm not sure exactly what I want to do so maybe it doesn't matter." I throw my hands up. He moves so that he can sit next to me.
"I just feel as if everyone has their futures planned out and I have know clue as to what I'm doing. Maybe I want to be a writer or maybe not. It's the only thing that I'm relatively good at. But I'm not sure if I see myself doing that for the rest of my life." I rant on while Jesse listens attentively.
"You can always go in undeclared. It'll be fine." He says and I nod my head weakly. I lean against his shoulder and close my eyes tiredly.
"So how long have you known that you wanted to go to Standford? And why did you completely lie to me about wanting to change your old ways and that you were only pretending to be smart. You are actually smart so why cover it up? I want the truth. Please... be honest with me" I plead with him. His grey eyes stare into me before he opens his mouth and runs his fingers through his hair.
