Almost There

- 36 -

What Tisha had told Tess weighed on her mind all night. She made it through her homework and then lay awake in bed, turning over Tisha's words in her mind and examining them from every angle, trying to make sense of it all.

But they're right. I didn't want to, Tess, but I did. I told him I wanted to wait...He said if I loved him, I'd do it.

Tisha had seemed so upset...Still, Tess knew that Tisha's story was only half a story. Tess didn't know Isaac's side, but she knew he was a good guy. There had to be an explanation.

Although Tess wanted to ask Isaac what had happened to reassure herself of his perspective, she didn't know how—so she didn't. As the days passed, she kept the story to herself, and as the drama of her interaction with Tisha was tempered by time, she became more and more certain that Tisha had gotten things all very wrong.

After all, as January drew to a close, Isaac continued to be a perfect gentleman to Tess. He walked her to class, chatted with her at lunch, and texted her every night. When February came, he finally convinced her to go out for sushi, something Tess had never tried.

"You'll love it," he said late one cold Saturday afternoon as they walked hand-in-hand up to the door of Sakura.

"Isn't it expensive?" Tess asked.

"It depends on where you go. This place isn't any more expensive than a burger joint. Don't worry about it."

He opened the door and Tess stepped into the warmth of the interior, where the hostess greeted them with a smile and showed them to a booth. Tess was both delighted and alarmed by the arrangement of chopsticks and tiny, rectangular soy sauce bowls on the table. "Please don't tell me I have to use chopsticks," she said.

"You don't know how?"

"Not really."

Isaac pointed at a jar on the front counter. It was filled with clever training chopsticks created with rolled-up wrappers and rubber bands. "Want me to get you one?"

Tess put her hand over her face and shook her head. "Please, no. I can embarrass myself enough on my own."

They talked and laughed as the waitress brought their drinks, and when it came time to order, Isaac selected a sushi sampler that was large enough for two so that Tess could try a variety of rolls.

As their conversation waned and they neared the conclusion of their meal, Tess decided it was time to talk to Isaac about what had been bothering her. "Hey, Isaac?"

"Yeah babe?" He took a sip of his water.

"You used to date Tisha, right?"

Setting his glass down on the table, Isaac said, "Yeah, that's no secret."

"Did you ever..." She hesitated, not sure how to ask him what she needed to ask. Isaac waited, raising his eyebrows in question, as she fumbled for words. "Did you ever—um..."

Isaac lowered his voice and leaned in toward her. "Are you trying to ask me if we ever had sex?" Isaac said.

A blush crept over her cheeks. "I didn't mean to pry."

He chuckled. "You're so cute, Tess. You don't have to be all shy about it. You're my girlfriend. We should be able to talk about that stuff, shouldn't we?"

"I guess."

"So yeah, we did. Does that bother you?"

Tess met his gaze. She knew she should have expected his response. It was pretty clear from Tisha's story, if not from the rumors in the halls, that he wasn't a virgin. He didn't seem to be shy about it, either.

"Tess?"

"No. I mean...no. It doesn't bother me."

He squinted, assessing her expression. "Not sure I believe you."

"It's not that. It's just..." It was a couple things, really. Having confirmation that Isaac was more experienced was weird, but it wasn't like she hadn't known already; it made her feel shy and a little anxious, but she would cross that bridge when they came to it—which wouldn't be for a while. More important that evening was the matter of Tisha. "I heard something."

Isaac pushed the wooden sushi board aside and laid his hands on the table, palms up. Responding to the intimate gesture, Tess laid her hands in his, and he folded his fingers around hers. "You talked to Tisha."

Surprised, Tess nodded. "I did. Well, I mean...she talked to me."

Shaking his head, Isaac sighed. "I never meant to hurt her feelings," he said. "But I guess I did. A lot, if she was talking to you about it."

"Isaac, what happened? She said you...like...pushed her into it." Just saying the words made Tess feel guilty for thinking anything bad about him; the look in his eye, a resigned disappointment, made it worse. "I just want to get your side of the story because you've been nothing but nice to me and I feel like—I feel like maybe there's more to it than that."

"There is, but I guess you won't believe it."

"No, I will. Just tell me."

"It's pretty simple. Tisha regretted it. It only happened once. I thought everything was fine between us before and after. She didn't even say anything. She just got weird. She stopped talking to me, and then she broke up with me like, a week later."

Tisha had broken up with Isaac? Tess had heard it the other way around from Mackenzie. But the details didn't matter; what mattered was understanding what had really happened. "She told me she hadn't wanted to."

"Well, it's just now how things happened that night." Isaac shrugged. "I didn't mean for things to get weird, Tess, but I don't know what else I could have done. It's not like she pushed me away. I thought it was what she wanted."

"But what about the rumors? People at school were talking about it. Did you have anything to do with that?"

"That was my asshole friend Dean," Isaac said. "A guy talks to his friend and he thinks he can keep a secret. I almost killed him. I didn't mean for it to get all out of control."

"Well...I have to admit that I'm scared." She bit her lower lip, thinking for a second about how to say what she wanted to say. "If we ever take things further, I don't want to be the talk of the school."

"I can promise you I learned my lesson about that. No one would know but us." Isaac smiled, that charming smile that made Tess's heart melt, and squeezed Tess's hands when she smiled back at him. He looked into her eyes and said, "I don't want to talk about Tisha any more. She's in the past, Tess. I'm with you now."