Almost There

- 34 -

Isaac and Tess didn't see one another through the rest of Christmas vacation, because Isaac was stuck with his family, but Tess was glad. Her own family home was dark and dreary; there were no Christmas decorations, no carols, no cookies. They did not go out to choose a Christmas tree, and the gifts—fewer this year than ever before—were stacked in a corner in shadow. The Christmas cheer and brightness that had pervaded the family's life every December for as long as Tess had been alive was gone.

Tess knew it would have broken Julia's heart. She'd loved everything about Christmas; maybe because of that, Christmas wasn't Christmas without her.

Clarette didn't get out of bed on Christmas Eve, and there was no chance of a special dinner. No one had mentioned it. No one had wanted to think about it. On Christmas Eve, Robert and Tess went to get Chinese takeout, and the family ate leftover lo mein and General Tso's chicken on Christmas Day. They talked about normal things, edging around the grief which, although it had begun to ebb throughout that first year without Julia, had swept over them again in full force. They used paper plates, leaving the once-a-year china in the cabinet, and threw the fortune cookies away unopened.

Although Tess's Christmas gift to Isaac was rather delayed, she did find him something she thought he'd enjoy: a beanie like the one he'd been chided for wearing on the first day of school. There was a logo for his favorite video game embroidered on the front. Because they hadn't seen one another at the proper time, they arranged to meet before school on the first day back to exchange gifts.

Weary and drained from the second Christmas without her sister, Tess tried to look forward to the gift exchange. It was the last thing, the last obligatory Merry Christmas before she could focus again on the school year and leave the holidays behind.

"Happy New Year," Isaac said when they met in the school cafeteria. It was mostly empty; a few scattered students were eating breakfast, but it was quiet.

"Happy New Year," Tess replied. "I've missed you."

He kissed her briefly, perhaps mindful that they were at school and that there was a lunch lady not far away. "I've missed you too. I got you something." He produced a small package wrapped in red paper from his pocket.

"What do you know, I got you something, too," said Tess. She unslung her backpack from her shoulder and poked around in the front pocket until she found the now-crumpled package. "Sorry. I'm not the world's best wrapper."

Isaac laughed. "Well, my dad wrapped that for you, so I guess we're even."

Giggling, Tess bent her head to the gift and tore away the wrapping paper. Inside was a silver bracelet, a simple chain with a heart charm. "Isaac, this is so pretty! Thank you!"

With a grin, he took the bracelet out of the box and held it up. "Let me help you put it on."

Tess pulled up her sleeve and held out her wrist, watching him clasp the bracelet for her. "I really love it."

"I'm glad. When I told my grandpa I had a girlfriend, he asked me what I'd gotten you for Christmas. I told him to guess. He said, 'I don't know, Zaac, some Instagram?'"

They shared another laugh; Tess was smiling so much her cheeks hurt. "That's really cute," she said.

"Long story short, now Grandpa's on Instagram. Should I open yours?"

"Please." Tess clasped her hands together. She knew Isaac must have spent more on her present than she had on his; she was suddenly self-conscious about his gift. "Just be honest."

He tore away the wrapping paper to reveal the beanie, and a slow smile spread over his face.

Worried it was feigned, Tess began to explain. "Maybe you've stopped wearing them—I noticed you don't wear that red one any more—"

"This is awesome, Tess! I stopped because I lost it!" He tugged the beanie onto his head, grinning. "It's perfect. How did you know about Fallout?"

Tess raised her eyebrows. "You must not realize how much you talk about video games," she said.

With a chuckle, Isaac took their wrapping paper and crumpled it into a ball. He began to walk, and Tess followed, pausing as he stopped to toss the wrapping paper into a bin. "That's probably fair."

As they headed toward the locker hall, Tess's hand brushed Isaac's, and their fingers naturally intertwined. "Are you excited for your new classes?" she asked.

"Actually, I kind of am. I have a work study during pink block now, and I think they're going to let me go with Mr. Varner." Mr. Varner was one of the facilities maintenance men responsible for repairing things at the school. "I bet it'll be easy; he's pretty chill. What about you?"

"Most of my classes are the same," Tess said. "You know I'm not getting out of Spanish since you're stuck with me, too. I guess that's not a bad thing, but I do wish I could be done with English."

"Yeah? You still hanging out with that tutor?"

They had reached Tess's locker. She opened the door and swung her heavy backpack off, then slung it on one of the hooks inside and unzipped it. She and Isaac hadn't talked much about Miguel—they didn't talk much about school, since Isaac didn't like much about school at all. "I still wouldn't call it hanging out, but yes."

"Really?" He leaned against the locker next to Tess's. "Huh."

Glancing up at him, Tess smiled. "I've got Bs in both classes," she said with pride.

"I would think you wouldn't need him any more, then."

"Why? I like Miguel. I can do better with his help than I could ever do on my own."

Isaac made a non-committal sound, watching Tess unload her books.

Tess gathered her Spanish stuff and then closed her locker, setting off with Isaac to his. By now, the halls were filling with students; when they reached Isaac's locker, the first bell rang, signaling the start of the first school day back from winter break. Isaac was quiet as he gathered his books and shut his locker door.

"Isaac?" Tess followed him toward their Spanish classroom. "You okay?"

"Just thinking," Isaac said. "Thinking there must be something wrong if you still need a tutor going into the second semester of the class."

Tess's heart sank; she wasn't sure how to feel about the comment. Did he mean she was stupid, or that Miguel was bad at his job? "What do you mean?"

"Like, can't he teach you the tricks and then just...leave?" Isaac paused before they reached the door to the classroom, where Señora López was briskly greeting her returning students. "Or you could just go to the teacher for help. That's what they get paid to do, isn't it? Help students?"

It was sounding suspiciously like Isaac didn't want Tess to work with Miguel. Tess thought they had settled matters months before, but maybe it had been on his mind more than he'd let on.

"Isaac..."

"Don't worry about it." He shook his head. "I was just thinking. We're gonna be late for class."