The Ruby in the Storm

Chapter 37: The Secrets of Our Universe

Chapter 37: The Secrets of Our Universe

John admired his mother's resilience during the voyage. He had to remember that this was one she had made before, when he was a young boy, but she was older now, and much more frail to the naked eye. However, those that knew Malia knew that she had a spine of steel. If the voyage was making her sick, she would not show it. In fact, he highly doubted that it was at all.

"It feels like a lifetime ago that I came this way for the first time," Malia said while standing out on the decks with John. "I was mortified every time the ship moved, but I had to put on a brave face for you."

John shook his head. "You didn't have to do that, mother."

"Of course I did!" She insisted. "You were so young, John, so small. You were already scared at the first odd gust of breeze, how do you think you would have fared if you saw that I was afraid as well?"

"Well, it's as you said, I was young. How would I have known?"

His mother smiled and stroked her son's face. "You're your father's son, John. You would've known."

John sighed; feeling slightly troubled hearing her say that. "I know that John Quincy is my father, mother. And I know you loved him... But he stands for everything that I cannot, so I do not know if I can willingly accept being called his son."

Malia frowned, but she knew exactly what he was talking about. "Do not exclusively blame your father for both of our sins, John. I made the mistake of loving him as well."

"That may be so, but what sort of position did he put you in?" John asked. "Think about it mother: father was a man of some significant authority. He came from a wealthy family, he was a magistrate, and you were a servant."

"And?"

John was quickly losing patience. How could she not see what he was implying? "Did it never cross your mind that his attraction to you was solely based on the control he could have, and not from a genuine place in his heart? That he saw you as a forbidden fruit that he could attain with little consequence just based on who he was?"

At first he thought his mother would lash out at him, perhaps even scream or storm off. He had thought such things for a long time, but never once voiced them in fear of insulting her, but how could he hold his tongue knowing that his father was not the saint that everyone painted him to be?

However, when she spoke, her voice was oddly level, and with the soft caress of the cool sea breeze causing her hair to wisp about her face, she almost looked at peace.

"You suspect that of him, John," she said, "but I knew it to be true."

In his wildest dreams John would have never anticipated that response from her, and his shock must have shown all over his face, because it caused her to chuckle.

"I am not saying that your father did not love me," she continued, "he did. We loved each other a great deal. But his attraction to me was based on the fact that having me was against every moral code he claimed to stand by, and that enticed him more than anything else. Perhaps when I was younger and more impressionable, I knew it, but I ignored it. It only became clearer after I left with you, after we started our lives far away from him."

John felt something tighten in his heart hearing her speak those words. "Did it... Does that not hurt you? To know that he used you?"

Malia shook her head, still smiling. "I used him too, my love. He wanted to deviate from his moral path, and I wanted to rage against the society that sought to oppress me. Look at how this foreign witch seduced the largest, most respected man in town! It made me feel powerful in a way I never thought I could. It only goes to show that no one is perfect, John. We are all flawed. My only solace is knowing that you, my son, have seen the flaws. You will not make the same mistakes that we did."