You Raise Me Up (Artemi Panarin)

Epilogue

"Dear Artemi,

When I was a little girl, I dreamed of this exact life. A beautiful house, beautiful kids, a great job and of course the hockey player husband that turns my hair grey before I turn 30. But I don't mind the grey hairs because it's a small price to pay when it's happiness we're taking about here.

The first 23 years of my life had been a series of no's. No going outside, no going in public, no going over to friends houses or ordering out food or living really. You hear no so many times you stop fighting it. You accept that your life will amount to nothing, just one big no. I had accepted that as my fate by the time I was sixteen assumed that this is how things have to be. Instead of having a sweet sixteen I was facing the fact that my life was going to be a whole bunch of nothing. A lot of air filters and gloves and masks. No friends or love.

But then you came into my life, like a wrecking ball you changed everything I ever knew about my life. If my first 23 years was time wasted, then then next seven had been spent making up for it with you. The first year was hard, for you learned about who I was and why I was that way. You took a broken girl and you loved her anyway. You taught me that life isn't about yes and no, it's about love and lose. And you don't lose if you love. You showed me that.

Then I got cured and you showed me how life should be lived. And we loved it. You showed me things I've never seen before. Which was mostly everything. I saw things I've told myself weren't real, but only because I could never see them. But things were looking up as I had defeated the odds and I was free with no repercussions.

Then when we were told there was no way I could ever had kids because my disease was genetic and I would pass it down to our kids should I have them. There was no way I could do that to any kids for my cure was a one in a billion chance of working and I didn't want to chance it again. You held me as I cried in your arms, I knew that was the fate but to hear it still hurt. I thought that if they fixed me they could fix that too but they couldn't. You promised me that it was going to be okay, we were going to have kids and have the most incredible family.

And now we have two beautiful children that we adopted from Russia that we can love and hold. Our little boy is big and strong like you and our little girl is so smart. Now it's been five years since we got married and I am so so thankful that it was you who got stuck with me. Thank you for everything.

Love your wife,
Valerie."

Artemi puts the paper down as he smiles at me. He pulls me into his lap before kissing my cheek.

"I can't believe all you asked for our five year anniversary was a letter" I giggle as I wipe at my cheek.

"I miss these letters" he claims.

"I do too" I admit.

"You know, I still have all of the letters" he claims and I smirk.

"No you don't" I accuse.

"Yes I do" he defends. "I'll show it to you" he insists.

He picks me up and I let out a laugh. I wrap my arms around his neck as he carries me up to our room. He sets me down and goes into the closet. He pulls out a chest full of papers and I smile.

"Sometimes I take them on the road with me and read them. That way when I can't reach you, I can steal reach you" he smiles.

"You are seriously the most amazing man ever, you know that" I ask.

"I try to be" he shrugs.

I pull him into a passionate kiss but it gets broken up quickly.

"Mommy" a sweet little voice calls out and we break apart.

"Even on our anniversary" I laugh.

"Go get em" he teases as he smacks my butt and I roll my eyes.

I go around the corner to Vladimir's room and find Alexis on the top bunk.

She had her own room but she always wants to be with her brother. They were adopted together when he was a year and a half and she was a newborn. We've had them for about four years now and we have loved every single second with them. They loved coming to games and spending the summer in Russia.

"What's wrong baby" I ask.

"I can't get down" she sighs.

"Why didn't Vladimir help" I ask looking for her brother.

"I tried" he whines and I laugh.

"Where are you" I ask.

"Up here" he cheers as he jumps up next to his sister.

"And how did you get up here" I ask.

"I was going to save my sister! But then I got stuck too" he says and I laugh.

"Alright. Well I think we need daddy in here to help" I say.

"DADDY" they yell at the same time and Artemi comes running into their room.

"What's wrong" he asks frantically.

"You and mommy have to save us" Alexis says and he relaxes.

"I can do that" he insists.

"Alright. On the count of three jump" I tell them and they nod their heads. Artemi stands in front of Alexis and Vladimir gets ready for take off in front of me.

"One... two... THREE" I yell and they jump off. We easily catch the kids before setting them down on the ground.

"Again again" Alexis cheers and I laugh.

"No can do missy" Artemi insists. "Mommy and daddy have a date tonight" he tells her.

"Oh mommy can I help you get ready" she asks and I smile.

"Of course baby" I assure her.

I get ready in Artemi and I's room as I let Alexis pick out a dress and do my hair and makeup. She stops in the middle of braiding my hair and looks over my shoulder. He

"What's all that paper for" she asks.

"Back when your mommy and daddy were young we used to send each other letters. There was a time when I couldn't leave my place and go see your father. So we would pass each other notes so we could still talk" I explain.

"Why didn't you just text" she asks.

"If we did that then I wouldn't have all of these to look back on now would I" I ask.

"I guess not" she agrees.

She finishes me off and I go downstairs where Artemi was waiting. I tap him on his shoulder and he turns around. I had Alexis in my arms as we look up to Artemi.

"Oh wow" he gasps. "Look at my beautiful girls" he says and I smile.

"We clean up nice" I tease.

We leave the kids with their grandparents and we go out to dinner. I sit across from him and watch as he orders a tea and orders the same for me. He turns to me after the waiter leaves and I smile.

"What are you so happy about" he asks.

"I was just thinking about how being married five years makes me feel like I've known you forever" I admit.

"I hope that's not a bad thing" he admits.

"It's not" I assure him. "Do you remember that day when I was really sick and you couldn't come over but I asked you to sing to me and you did it on the other side of the door" I ask.

"Yeah. I'm happy you couldn't see how nervous I was" he admits.

"That's the exact moment I realized that I loved you" I admit.

"Really" he asks and I nod. "Me too."

"I always loved that song" I admit.

"Why is that" he asks.

"Because it's true. You raised me up to more than I can be."