You're My Only Direction

Chapter Twenty-Five

            Harry’s POV

            A sliver of light spread across the floor as my door creaked open slightly. I peered over in curiosity; no one ever comes in at this hour… Suddenly, the door was flung completely open and a figure stood in the doorway, surrounded by golden light. My room had been pitch black and it took a few moments to adjust to the brightness. I squinted and tried to make out the figure, but the light was so dazzling that the person was completely silhouetted.

            For a few minutes they just stared at me, drawing in large rasping breaths. I could see the clear rise and fall of their chest as they continued staring at me. I opened my mouth to ask who it was, but my throat was far too dry and words refused to form.

            The figure stepped forward, flicked on the light, and turned to me. I looked into those familiar crystal-blue eyes, and my heart stopped beating.

            Louis.

            His face was so different from the one in my memory; his face was drawn and his eyes had prominent dark circles under them. His eyes, although glittering with excitement, held a new despair that had never been there before. His skin was covered in disturbing cuts and bruises. I glanced at his arms and noticed similar welts. I had never seen him looking so ragged. What happened to my Boo Bear?

            I turned my face away because I couldn’t bear to look into those broken blue eyes anymore.

            “Harry,” he croaked.

            I snapped my focus back to him, and I could see tears forming in his eyes, but at the same time a grin danced upon his lips. Suddenly my Boo Bear was back; there was light in his eyes again. All of the genuine love that he always had for life had returned to his face.

            Oh Boo Bear, it’s so nice to see you looking so well…

            This isn’t right. I’ve seen him on T.V. I’ ve seen the stories, his drinking, his refusals to perform, everything. I’ve seen it all. I even saw the accident. Louis is gone; there is no possible way he could’ve survived getting hit by a car.

            This is just that same old dream once again…

            “Don’t…” I pleaded, looking into his cheerful eyes.

            “What do you mean, Haz?” He asked, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

            “Don’t, please don’t do this to me,” I begged, staring into his eyes intently.

            “What are you talking about?” He demanded, annoyance clear on his face.

            “ Don’t do what you always do; every night you do this to me! You appear in my room, but then I wake up and you’re gone and I realize that it was all just a dream. Stop doing this to me!” I exclaimed, tears welling up in my eyes. “I can’t take it anymore, I already feel terrible enough; you died because of me!”

            “Harry, what are you saying? Harry, listen to me, I’m not dead! I’m right here; I’m alive. I’m breathing, see? I’m right here; I’m perfectly fine,” He gasped, kneeling at the side of my bed and grasping my hand in his own. It felt so real, but I knew it couldn’t possibly be; I wouldn’t let myself be fooled once again.

            “Stop, stop, stop, you do this every night. You try to convince me that you’re alive and the moment that I believe you, I wake up and you’re gone once again!” I shrieked hysterically.