3.1 | Flawless | ✔

1 - A Colorless Painting (part 1)

The Fear - Lily Allen

1 - A Colorless Painting (part 1) 

I updated parts 1 and 2 of this. So remember to read both!!

Word count: 1211

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."

- Marilyn Monroe

***

"Pathetic."

"Waste of my damn space."

"My grandma looks better in that, then she does." 

"Shut up!" My best friend, Callum shouts to the horrifying crowd in front of us. Despite my traumatized state, I manage to give him a grateful smile. 

All of the students surrounding us send me disgusted looks and stomp off somewhere else. As soon as they are gone, Callum pounces on me. I breathe his delicious scent in as I attempt to calm down. 

He rubs soothing circles into my waist; whispers comforting words into my ear. My skin tingles at the sensation of him being close to me. My body craves more of it--the sparks that brings content. 

Callum has been my best friend forever. I met him when I was two—that's what I've been told—at a playdate. Apparently, when he had to leave, I put up quite a fight to stop him leaving. I was clinging to him and wailing so loudly that they ended up staying later. 

Ever since then, he's always been with me. He's my closest friend, the one I tell everything. Well, nearly everything. 

I'm in love with him. 

And that's not in a platonic way. I am hopelessly and romantically in love with Callum Jerald. And he has no idea.

Eventually, much to my dismay, we pull away. Callum's strong hands are still on my shoulders, as a sign of comfort. I stare into his hypnotic green eyes, the eyes that always seem to entrance me with its beauty. 

Callum is one of the popular boys. Of course he would be with his model looks and charm. A simple smile could have girls falling to their knees. He plays for the football team and is on the student council. Overall, he's the unofficial golden boy. Perfect in every way.

The fact he's not a snob or an ass shows how true he stays to himself. He's thoughtful and kind, always helping others out. Including me.

He's your dream guy. 

Me on the other hand, I'm the outcast. The unpopular girl. The ugly duckling. 

I get bullied a lot. Mostly by jealous girls who despise the fact that I'm super close to Callum. What they don't realize is that I will never be with him the way I want to. Callum only sees me as his best friend, a sister. 

I hate it. I long for something more, I long for him. 

But it will never happen. Only in my dreams. 

"Anastasia, don't listen to them. They are so wrong about you." Callum encourages, giving me a sad, sympathetic smile. I hate that he pity's me. I don't want pity. "You are beautiful inside and out."

I blush at his words and bite my lip anxiously. I know he only means it in a friendly way but that doesn't stop my mind from thinking he means more. He means that finds me attractive. 

"Thanks," I shyly mumble and look around. I'm trying to see if I can find my two best friends, Ares and Athena. The twins. 

Their parents are really into Greek mythology. So much that they named their own children after two Greek Gods. They hate the names but can't change it because their parents flat out refuse to allow it. I like their names though, its unique. 

I met both of them two years ago, in freshman year. I was being picked on by Lily, the cheer captain. They quickly swept in and saved me from one of Lily's horrendous schemes. At first, I was extremely wary of them. I mean, they were popular and pretty people who could do anything they liked. But they didn't. They proved to me that not everyone is horrible. 

"Sia!" Athena calls from the end of the hall, using the nickname she gave me. According to her, Anastasia is a too much of a mouthful. She rushes over to us and stops a few inches in front of me. "Are you okay? I heard there was a commotion." She asks with concern, her tanned cheeks flustered. 

Athena is a gorgeous girl. She has long, straight and silky black hair and vibrant grey eyes. She is very similar to her brother. Their hair is jet black and silky; they are fairly pale. Oh, and they are also extremely tall. They look exactly alike except for the different eye color. Athena has grey eyes whilst Ares has hazel eyes. 

They are both very athletic. Ares plays football with Callum and Athena participates in soccer sometimes. She goes running regularly as well. 

"I'm okay now. Thanks to Callum, for coming to my rescue again." Is my answer, giving Callum a happy smile. He returns it happily. 

Athena watches our small interaction with a smirk. When she catches my eye, she gives me a knowing look and wiggles her eyebrows. She's been aware of my crush for a long time now; is always teasing me about it. She always claims that we would be the perfect couple. But I always disagree, saying it would never happen because Callum doesn't like me like that. 

Athena would only wave it off and say I'm just oblivious. She refuses to give up her ship. 

"Great!" She chirps. "Now let's get to lessons."

I bid Callum a goodbye, for now, promising to see him at lunchtime. Athena links her arm with me and leads me down to Maths.

If there is one subject I hate more than anything else, its maths. I just can't comprehend any of the stuff. Athena is a maths whizz; so she tries to tutor me in our spare time. However, I'm never able to process it.

"You know," Athena starts in a low voice. Her grey eyes dart between different students who give me dirty looks. "They are completely wrong about you Sia. You are amazing. They're only jealous of you. They make you think you're weak and worthless, they've gotten into your head. But you're not. You are stunning."

"Athena—"

"No, don't deny it." She cuts me off. "They bully you because you don't stand up for yourself. They think you are weak and useless. They think you're the reason Callum won't date any of them. Its not fair and I'm so sorry I can't be there to punch them in the face more often."

I take a deep breath. I want to believe her so badly but I just can't. I've been tormented by them for so long that I just can't see myself as this incredible girl Athena is describing. Callum, Athena, and Ares have told me numerous times that I should ignore them but after hearing all of it so much, it sticks to you. Its always going to be engrained in my mind that I'm not good enough.

Sometimes I just want to run away. Change my identity and become someone new. Someone who is strong, beautiful and courageous. Someone who's not me.

"Thanks, Athena," I respond with a fake smile.