Chapter 9- Part 5

3K 35 19
                                    

"Jacob, what are you doing in here? It isn't safe," I say, distressed. "I'm not safe," I add. I look around and realise my window is open, that's how he has gotten in. He walks over to me and I find myself walking backwards; taking one step back to every step he takes forward. Eventually I find myself against the wall yet he is able to get closer to me. I hold a hand out to stop him. I look at him with pure terror in my eyes and wonder if he can see it. He keeps walking towards me until his chest is pushed against my open plam. He finally stops and I drop my hand.

"What is going on, Nes? Talk to me," he pleads.

"What are you doing here?" I repeat.

"Trying to figure out what is wrong with you," he says, his voice drenched with concern.

"Jake, I am fine, I-" He takes both of my hands in his.

"Don't give me that, what is really going on?"

"I told you last night Jake."

'Why push me away then? I can help you."

"I-" I stop, trying to think of a valid excuse. There is none, Jake's a werewolf, he can protect himself, can't he? Well lets just test that theory. "Okay, Jake, I am going to try something and not take it as a joke, okay?" He raises an eyebrow, confused. "My moods are all muddled up and are confusing me, smallest thing sets me off. Remember what I told you last night?" He nods. "Well, I don't know if I can hurt you, if I snap. Right now I am going to test that. Don't be afraid to use your full strength, Jake. If you do I will think I'm right and tell you to leave, again. If I get the outcome I want, however, I will forget about all of this."

"What are you talk-" his sentence is cut short as I jump out of my window, landing perfectly on two feet. As soon as I straighten myself Jake is by my side.

"This is stupid," he states. I don't answer him, instead I turn around and run to about thirty or so metres away from him. He stays put and turns to face me.

"Jake, trust me." Relisation about what I am trying to do flickers before his eyes. I run as fast as I can to him,using all my speed. Even though this is all happening in only seconds I know every detail and it is as if it is happening at normal pace for me. At the last second he steps aside and reaches his arm out. He grabs my waist and turns me around, my back against his chest. I can feel the warmth of his breath on my neck.

As soon as my back gets pushed against his chest his hands are on my head. If I was actually fighting Jake at this moment I would be terrified as only one movement of Jake's wrists would break my neck. I try to get out of his grip but it is too firm. I keep saying I want to protect him from myself but it is also the Volturi -they won't go easy on him, if anything they'll be even harder.

I stop for a second, wanting to keep trying to prove a point. His arms slightly loosen and its enough for me to swing around, make him fall onto the ground with me standing over him. "Told you," I said, wishing I was wrong. "Now leave."

"Nes-"

"Leave!" I say, wanting him to leave before I break down again. I can feel tears trying to escape the corner of my eyes but I don't let them. I thought I wouldn't cry anymore but I guess I do. This realisation still doesn't stop me from thinking how I do. I love him, I am in love with Jake and nothing I say can keep him away. Nothing I do will keep him away. Nothing. But that doesn't mean I won't try.

"You stopped! I thought we were done" -he stops as his voice was beginning to rise, he calms himself down before continuing- "Renesmee, I can look after myself. Let me-"

"No Jacob! Leave! Please?! Can't you see I am doing this for you?!" My voice rises and at that moment my mother and father arrive, keeping their distance. Allowing Jake and I to finish what I have started.

He walks closer to me and tries to grab my wrist. I quickly step back. He stops. I can see the sorrow in his eyes which makes me feel guilty. How can I feel guilty? I am helping him! I am protecting him! Or is that just my excuse? I don't know anymore. I can't reason with him, I cannot show that I care, or else he will never leave.

"Jake, can't you see? I don't need you! I don't need your help! You're only getting in the way. Leave! Before you do get hurt!!!" I yell at him before I can stop myself. I know that to make him leave I had to hurt him but not like that. Acting as if I don't even care for him. As if I don't love him. As if this whole time I have just been using him for protection and I don't need him anymore? That's a lie. He knows that, right?

"Jake-"

"I get it, okay? You want me gone, fine. Goodbye, Renesmee," he says before turning around and running away into the woods.

Renesmee's Story (A Twilight Fan Fiction) *BEING EDITED*Where stories live. Discover now