Just Let Me Love You (The Wanted fanfic)

47: Of Course You Matter

"Well?" Nathan asks, "Was it?" I can't give him an answer. I've gone back to feeling stupid because of the whole thing, and I'm too stubborn to admit that it was. "Linds" He sighs, "Just tell me"

I shrug and look down, so I can avoid his gaze. I then nod, as I need to stop being so stubborn especially with Nathan. "A little bit"

He doesn't say anything which makes me uncomfortable.

We're currently sat in the back garden to the Sing Off house. There are no cameras and it's very private, so there's no chance of paparazzi getting any photos. "I knew it was"

I still can't bring myself to look at him, as I don't want to see his reaction.

"You know what Linds" He pauses for a brief second after he says; "I don't get you. You tell me that you don't want me and then you go and sing what you did"

"It wasn't exactly easy for me either" I say quietly, as I fiddle with the zip on my jacket.

"Then why do it?" It is obvious that he's annoyed, but he tries to calm himself down by sighing and sitting back into the bench; which I'm glad for as I don't like him being angry, as it makes me feel worse, "I just-" I can tell that he's stopped himself from finishing his sentence, "I miss you"

"Do you not think that I miss you?" I ask, finally looking up at him. Seeing his expression makes me want to give in and kiss him and tell him to never leave me, but I know that I can't.

"Then why leave me?" He asks quickly after my comment.

I look away from him again, "I told you why" I probably seem so selfish, but I know that my career should be more important. I need this, I have nothing to fall back on.

"What about me? Do I not matter?"

"Of course you matter" I look up at him again, but now he isn't looking at me.

The only thing I can think is that is better than not speaking at all, but it hurts to see him like this; "Nath, I'm sorry"

He shakes his head and sighs, "I'm being dramatic, I can't push you into it, but I don't want to lose you, so stop pushing me away"

For a brief moment we just look at each other, until I hug him. I wrap my arms around his neck and he pulls me close to him.

"I don't want arguments" He says, as he shows no sign of letting me go.

"Stop going on about that, we're friends now" This is my way of discreetly trying to make things okay. 

"Are we?" He asks with a laugh, as he pulls away to look at me.

"Yeah" I confirm with a nod, "I've decided"

"I actually missed you a lot more than I thought I would" He sounds a lot calmer than he did a couple of minutes ago, but that is because we've finally stopped arguing and actually started speaking again.

I smile at this, as it genuinely makes me happy to know that he still cares for me even though I'm an idiot.

"And I-"

My phone going off cuts him off.

"It's Zoe, she's said that she's in the van and I need to leave now" I read aloud from the screen of my phone.

"So where do we stand?" He asks, watching me, as I put my phone back into my jacket pocket.

"Friends?" I don't mean for it to sound as questioning as it does, but I need to see his reaction to the whole thing.

He nods, "Alright"

We both stand up and he hugs me straight away; holding me closely; the gesture takes me off guard at first, but I quickly hug him back.