The Book of Curses (BTS x Supernatural) (Namjin)

Fire in the hole

"You actually went out for a run, Kookie?"

"Yes, hyung. Hobi hyung came with me too."

"You should excercise once in a while, Yoongi. It won't kill you to be able to run away from monsters." Hoseok panted, as he wiped off the sweat dripping from his face.

"Nah, I don't run from monsters. I kill them. Did you guys get breakfast?"

"Yes, hyung. One double bacon cheeseburger, fries and chocolate cake." Jungkook said as he counted off the list of things from his finger, grinning while passing the package to Yoongi.

"You know, even if monsters don't kill you, your diet is going to soon enough." Hoseok said as he gulped down his cucumber-lemon infused tonic water.

"First off, I see no need for cucumber water. I am the savior of mankind. I damn right deserve to eat only the best of foods offered by the world. If its greasy bacon cheeseburger, so be it. Secondly, chocolate cake? I asked for pie!"

"They didn't have pie. I figured chocolate cake would kindda be the same?" Jungkook answered hesitantly, quickly taking shelter behind Hoseok's back.

"Same difference? Are you kidding me? Pie is-"

"If you don't want it, we could gladly throw it away." Hoseok interrupted, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Whatever. But I'm letting you off only this time." Yoongi muttered as he chowed down on his meal.

"Kookie, let's go grab a salad. Watching him eat is going to give me an aneurysm."

"Yes, hyung. Can we grab some ddeokbokki on the way back? I've been having cravings lately!"

"Anything you want, young one. Anything you want."

"You're the best, hyung!"

"You better hope Yoongi doesn't hear that."

"I HEARD THAT, YOU LITTLE SHIT."

"Damn, let's run, hyung!"
________________________________________

Namjoon wasn't a morning person. Period.

Sundays were especially hard for him to bring himself to get off the bed. He needed a valid reason to leave the comfort of his fortress, usually it's the urge to pee, the angry rumblings of his stomach, Seokjin's honey glazed voice or the smell of pancakes and coffee wafting through the cracks of his bedroom door, tantalizing his senses, making him salivate and roll off the bed - almost as if he was in a trance.

Other times, he is rudely awaken when two shitty brats decide that his bedroom was their playground. Today it's tag. With water guns. Namjoon jerked awake when a squirt of water hit him squarely in the face. "Do you fucktards want to die!?" he yelled, jumping out of bed. "Dad, cursing in front of your kids is highly frowned upon. You should refrain from doing so." Jimin said, ducking behind the armchair, away form Tae's firing range. "I second that." Tae whispered, sneaking up behind Namjoon - using him as a shield against Jimin's onslaught. "Out. Now. And you are not my children." Namjoon stressed each syllable, very quietly; finally making the youngest two stop in their tracks, Tae even stopped breathing as they both quietly tiptoed their way out of the room.

Namjoon sighed. This was not how he imagined his life to be, especially not at this age. He got up, stretched and walked towards the bathroom, yawning as he wondered if it was wise if he were to jump back onto the bed for another couple of minutes or at least till Jin was the one to walk up those stairs to wake him up, a soft smile on his lips. That was what Namjoon loved waking up to. Not a mochi ball or an adorable alien child. He casually glanced at his study, looking at the time when he noticed that the little black book was opened. Namjoon stopped in his tracks, cocking his head a little. "Was the book left opened last night?" he wondered vaguely. He was pretty certain that he slammed the book shut before going to bed. Namjoon moved slowly towards the table. "Maybe since it's so old, it takes time before the magic works?" he tried reasoning. Namjoon was almost afraid of looking at the book, but he couldn't deny that his heart was aching from the excitement. "Procuring a magical book? Wait till my book club members hear about it." he thought gleefully. He peeked at the book and he felt his heart drop to the ground. "Those brats must have wrote this." he scoffed. He slammed the book shut, again and stormed off to the bathroom. "How stupid of me to hope."

A hot shower was exactly what Namjoon needed. He could never describe the relief he felt when bathing. How calm it all was, as if time stopped ticking. He could spend eternity in there and when he comes out, the world would be the same. Namjoon spent a lot of time thinking in the shower. Some of his best ideas came to him in the shower. Other times, he ends up falling asleep.

Taehyung dragged a still sleepy Jimin to the kitchen. Jimin slumped on to the chair near the kitchen counter and rested his cheeks on the cool marble top, lulling back into sleep. Taehyung moved around the kitchen with a purpose, opening the cabinets, taking out ingredients, measuring tools and whatnot. Jimin had no idea as to what his purpose was in the kitchen that early in the morning, especially when even Jin hyung wasn't awake yet. Taehyung had yet to tell him but Jimin knew asking was not going to get him anywhere, especially if Taehyung had no intention of letting him know. "At least he didn't try anything stupid on his own. I'm capable of handling Taetae." Jimin thought smugly, eyes barely open as he watched Taehyung pour half of said ingredients out of the bowl rather than in it. Jimin sighed. Cleaning up was going to be troublesome.

"Chimchim ah, help me fry eggs please." Taehyung finally said.

"You gonna let me know what you up to?" Jimin asked sleepily, making no attempts to move from the chair.

"You don't know what day today is?" Taehyung asked, eyebrow raised.

"No, I don't." Jimin replied, curiosity piqued.

"Mother's Day! well, sort of. More like Jin-hyung's day." Taehyung replied, reabsorbed in measuring ingredients.

"Shit, it's his birthday?" Jimin asked, jumping out of the chair.

"Of course not. Don't you think Dad would have planned something if it was?" Taehyung scoffed.

Jimin was getting tired. This was not getting anywhere. Figuring out how Taehhyung's mind worked was close to impossible.  "What exactly do you plan on doing?"

"I wanted to make breakfast for Jin hyung for once rather than have him do it for us, like he does on a daily basis. Will you help me?" Taehyung asked, boxy smile in place.

Jimin internally groaned. There was no way he could say no now. "Of course, Taetae. Of course."

"Awesome. I'll work on the waffles. You fry the egg and bacon. Sounds cool?" Taehyung asked, as Jimin finally started moving towards the pots and pans.

Namjoon expected the house to be quiet as he walked out of the shower, drying his hair. But it wasn't. It was loud, but unnaturally so. Expecting any sort of normalcy in a house with Jimin and Tae is a long shot, he knew that but even for them, this was weird. Namjoon strained his ears trying to listen to the conversation going on outside while looking for a clean shirt to wear.

FIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. MUM, THE FREAKING KITCHEN IS ON FIRE!

Namjoon was startled. How in the world did he manage to start a fire from so far away? Was he gifted? Should he really change his name from Rap Monster to God of Destruction? But wait. This doesn't make sense. As much as Namjoon had a talent for breaking anything and everything he touched, he freaking needed to be there in order for it to break. So, if it wasn't him, then who?

SHIT, AGAIN? WHAT DID NAMJOON DO THIS TIME?

IT WASN'T DAD!

ARE YOU JOKING? NO ONE ELSE IS CAPABLE OF SETTING THIS HOUSE ON FIRE!

IT'S JIMIN. JIMIN SET THE KITCHEN ON FIRE TRYING TO FRY A BLOODY EGG. MUM, HELP!

JIMIN? JIMIN! OH MY GOD, ANOTHER GOD OF DESTRUCTION? I'M COMING. EITHER OF YOU, DON'T DO ANYTHING. AND PLEASE, DON'T LET NAMJOON IN THE VICINITY OF THE KITCHEN. JUST HIS PRESENCE MIGHT CAUSE SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION OF SOMETHING.

Namjoon dropped the t shirt he was holding to the ground and turned to look at the book sitting innocently on his desk. There was no fucking way. He slowly walked towards the book, hesitating when he approached it; afraid it might bite. Carefully, he flipped the pages open until he found what he was looking for. There, written neatly on the top was :

25th May 2017           10.30am
Jimin sets the kitchen on fire

Namjoon stumbled back and ran. Ran as far as he could away from the book. Only to have the youngest two catch him when he accidentally tried to run into the kitchen.