Vitality • Suite 103 Sequel (COMPLETE)

32. Lay In Your Bed

I sighed, and wiped my face. No one loved you like your momma loved you, and now that I'd let her in, I felt a million times more free, like things could actually get better.

My momma was right though, God obviously had some plan with me, some intention and purpose, and I couldn't give up on myself if he hadn't yet.

•

I finished my last song and did an encore, finally making my way off the stage. I had put my heart, soul, and time into my music for almost my whole life, and that was the only time I felt truly at peace.

Now the tour was over, and I could focus on my next album, my health, and my bitch ass legal problems.

"Aye, everyone come here!" I yelled to a majority of the crew, production to background dancers who were backstage at the venue still.

"I just wanted to say I appreciate all y'all for sticking with me for this tour, I love Team Breezy, I love y'all, and I know lately I haven't been myself, and we've lost some members along the way, but I'm sorry for that, genuinely, but I rock with y'all so tough. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sticking by my side through all this."

I got a bunch of course and we love you Chris's, we all did a group hug and prayer, and now I was walking back to the bus.

I'd finally be on the way home to see my boo boo Royalty, and spend as much time with her as I possibly could.

She was the only thing that could keep me consistently happy at this point, and when I looked at her I remembered why I still woke up and got through each day. It was just so wild to me that I loved her the way I did, and the judge and courts still believed a greedy ass woman about my parenting.

I would do anything for Royalty, give her anything she wanted and needed, everyone knew this, even my hateful ass baby momma, that's why she continiously did this to me, because she knew I was never gonna stop fighting for Royalty. She was my everything, and I'd pay whatever the courts wanted me to do just to make sure she wouldn't be taken away from me.

I also needed to do what I needed to keep her on my part, like get my health and life back on track. I couldn't be using around my daughter, and I couldn't afford to lose her over some drugs.

I walked back into what had been my room for the whole tour and started packing my clothes. The sooner I was done, the sooner I could get back to my damn life, or what was left of it.

As long as I had God, Royalty, my momma, and my fans I was good.

I grabbed my shoes and started throwing them into bags. I'd usually have Patrice do this, but she was gone, and I'd taken my momma's advice on apologizing, but she wasn't tryna come back at all.

So now I had to find a new assistant who was just as reliable as Patrice when I got back home, just another item on my todo list.

I needed to talk to Nia eventually too, cause even though I'd done almost everything possible to ruin us, I still love and missed her.

You couldn't just threw away the love and admiration you had for someone, despite what you told your mind to believe.

And if it was meant to be, it'd always be yours right? Despite mistakes, hurt feelings, infidelities, for better or worse, till death do us part.

It was almost as if God was speaking to me, practically screaming at me, telling me that this was my time, cause as soon as my thoughts started to wander, I heard my phone start to ring.

The house phone was calling me, and that meant it could only be one person.

I wasn't ready. I didn't know what to say. I know I needed to apologize, but I wasn't sure where to even start.

Damn I was gonna make her hang the phone up with how long I was bullshitting.

"Hello?"

I heard her take in a breath, or maybe it was me, who knew. "Hey Chris."

I felt like a kid on the first day of school, thinking of what I was gonna say I did over the summer time.

My name's Chris, and this summer I just chilled and played ball and madden with my friends.

"I know we hadn't talked in a minute, but we can't avoid it anymore, we need to discuss a few things."

I nodded as if she could see me and cleared my suddenly dry throat. I was actually nervous, like this woman wasn't my heart and soul at one point.

I'd let our foundation get so weak and shaky that I didn't know where we stood today, or how to even speak or approach the woman I loved.

"You're right, I, uh, just finished the last show of the tour, so we're hearing back in a few hours. How long you been back?"

"Today. And I got served, by Nia, as soon as I got to my office."

"Served?"

She matched my tone. "Like a plate? Yes served, she wants me to testify on her behalf that you're an unfit parent."

I fought the urge to throw my phone across the room straight into the wall. I needed to get better at controlling my anger, and not automatically go with my mood to get physical.

I couldn't help it though. I had literally just went to court, days before I started the tour.

"You already know I'm not even trying to involve myself, but it's getting serious, and I just wanted to know what you're gonna do."

I couldn't even think straight, my mind and thoughts racing three miles a minute.

"I probably should've waited until you came home, but I know that, um, well not home but back to LA." Nia started stuttering, bringing me back to where I was at this moment.

I couldn't even focus I was so mad. What did this bitch have against me? All I wanted to do was be a great father to my child and love her, and she just wanted to drag me through the mud.

"I just couldn't wait anymore, being back here in the house, it's just bringing back a lot of memories and I didn't know how to handle it."

"Nia, I know I said a lot of hateful hurtful things to you and I'm so sorry. I was hurting and confused, and honestly I still am. I thought I could talk about this with you right now too, cause I know we need to discuss things, but I'm so fucked up, it's not even funny." I laughed to myself, watching my hands shake.

Was this really my life? This is what it had come to?

"Fucked up? What's wrong Chris talk to me?"

"I will, I know I need to talk to you, I know I need to fix things. Just give me a little time okay? Please?" I practically begged, as I walked over to my backpack, sifting through it frantically looking for the one consistent thing that was on my mind.

I know I needed another outlet, I know I needed to stop, I just wanted to slow down the racing thoughts. Everything was happening too fast.

"Chris? Come home, let's talk please? I still love you, you were my best friend, I just wanna see you good."

I popped open my pill bottle and grabbed a percocet. "I love you too Nia. I'm coming home. I'm gonna fix everything. I made my bed, and I'm gonna lay in it."

"You don't have to do it alone though Chris. I know it's a lot. I didn't know Chris, I'm sorry. I feel so bad. I should've waited to tell you."

"It's my bed, and I'm gonna lay in it. I'll see you when I touch down."

Oooo, daddy coming home.