-fifty--

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--fifty- (what!!?)! 


So I'll get the lights, and you lock the doors.

Tell me all of the things that you couldn't before. 

+ Let's Hurt Tonight +

-

HIS DECELERATION CHANGED my entire world. It not only defined who I was in the camp, but also what had been happening to me whilst I had been inside. 

"I need more." I told him. "I need everything, Charles." 

"It's going to hurt you. If I say it, you won't forget." 

"Good." I said. "I'm tired of forgetting." 

He took a deep breath in trying to steady himself as best as he could before he broke my heart. The way I saw it, I broke his before, so it was only fair that it was his chance now, even if he didn't want to. 

"Research Development are the ones who aren't sick when they enter The Dormirs, but become sick somewhere down the line." 

I felt a sickening hollowness in my chest, a realization that the world was a very, very awful place. 

"We had no way of knowing which one you were until you were already inside. If we did, I never would have let you go."

"It's okay. I'm fine now. You found me." 

"Do you remember much about the disease?" 

I nodded, but when I thought about it, or at least tried to, everything was gone. I couldn't remember what it was or what it had done. I knew some of the facts: that it had killed millions already and that it spread particularly fast in boys, but I couldn't actually remember how. I explained this to him. He didn't seem surprised. 

"Its correct term is the Sensiemia Defect, but nowadays people call it The Surge." 

"The Surge?" 

"Yeah, like a power-surge, I guess." 

"Why that?" 

"Because of the way it attacks; sudden, a powerful affect." 

"How does it work?" 

He shook his head defiantly. "You're not ready." He sighed. I grew incredibly frustrated with his reply. 

"I'm never going to be ready." I argued. "Nothing is going to change until you tell me. You can't hide things from me." 

"I'm hiding things because you'll get hurt if you hear them when you're not prepared, and I'm not going to let that happen." 

"You can't decide that for me, Charleston. I need to figure it out for myself." 

"Well, at the moment, I know you better than you know yourself, so I'm saying that you're not ready." 

Hopelessly, I whispered his name. "Charles..." I had no way of fighting him. If I wasn't able to convince him otherwise, then I would be left in a blur of half-truths and false starts. An inescapable pit of doubt, in other words.  

I resorted to begging. "Please tell me." 

He shook his head, unable to meet my gaze. 

"Charleston!" My voice began to shake. He wouldn't respond, wouldn't face me; it made me feel so alone. "Please, Charles, please just tell me. You're supposed to tell me." 

He looked up at that moment, as if my words had triggered something inside of him. 

"I'm supposed to tell you these things?" He asked. 

I nodded, even though I knew there was so much that I was wrong about, this had to be something right. We weren't supposed to be keeping secrets from each other. Right? 

"Yes." 

He stood up abruptly, almost knocking his chair down on his way up. "I'm supposed to tell you everything, because we make decisions together right? Is that what you're trying to say?" 

It was my turn to not respond. I couldn't so much as nod this time. He was both confusing me and worrying me all at once. Was this some sort of reference to something that I had forgotten? Something I had done? I wanted to tell him that although I remembered him and what he had said to me once before, I couldn't recall many events or conversations or just memories in general. I needed him for that. 

"Well we don't." He told me, his eyes glistening with tears in between the shadows of the room. "Sometimes we have to do things because its what's best for us both, and sometimes we don't. We both have to live with it." He added. 

Pulling himself together, he concluded, his back towards me as he leaned against the table. "You're not ready." And that was that. 

I had no choice but to leave. 

-fifty--

22/12/17

FIFTIETH CHAPTER!!???! I actually can't believe it??? 

I have wrote fifty chapters for this book... I am so proud of how far it has come in such a short space, and I am so excited for you guys to see what's coming.

The next few chapters are going to reveal some devastating news for Pip, so stay tuned!

Also, in case you missed it, I HAVE A TRAILER FOR COUNTERFEIT UP ON YOUTUBE! It is posted on the chapter for this one, but you can also find it in my bio!

-

What did you think of Charleston in this chapter? Did you think he was being rude towards Pip, or do you think there is something else going on?

If so, what do you think might have happened?

Are you nervous for Pip to learn more about The Surge, or do you not want her to find out? And, what are your feelings about her being an RD? What do you think this means for her?

I love hearing your responses!

Hope you all have a safe and beautiful CHRISTmas time.

I love you guys.

-

"But our citizenship is in Heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there. The Lord Jesus Christ." Philippians 3:20 





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