Blood Sugar

Part Twenty-Nine: Castles Made of Sand

Time was passing in a flash. Today was Thursday which meant I was seeing John again. I still had the conversation with Josh in the back of my mind. Well.. he didn't tell me anything new. I knew from the start that these guys were no saints. But it always takes two and I wasn't gonna do anything, right? So no big deal. And buck off already, funny thoughts. 

Luckily I found a much better topic to think about on my way home from work: Chris' birthday was just around the corner. I gotta think of something special to get him. He's turning 25 and he'll throw this big bash where everybody is coming.. I mean.. everybody. And I can't fucking wait.. And his present has to be special. I should get him some real rare comic book to bring out his geeky side that I'm missing so bad. Wow, I get the best ideas on Thursday afternoons.

Right when I got to my apartment I wrote on my grocery list: COMIC BOOKS! so I wouldn't forget about it. The small light of my answer machine was flashing. "One new message", I chirped to myself. "Hello beautiful, I hope you're having a wonderful day and I can't wait to see you on Saturday." It was Lee. Wasn't he being sweet?

Now it was time to go. Shortly before I left, I went to the restroom and checked my face in the mirror. It was one of these days when I was comfortable with the way I looked. No redness, no dark circles. I grabbed some lipstick out of my bag and put it on. I let the lipstick back into my bag and looked at myself once more. God, what was I doing? I barely ever wear lipstick. Why would I change that for seeing John? I didn't put lipstick on for Lee. I grabbed a napkin and rubbed the light pink color off my lips.

When John opened the door for me, he was holding a cig in his hands. We sat down on his lounge room floor and he put on a Bowie record. "Hey, I just rolled myself a joint. Wanna share?", John asked. I nodded. 

Man, this one was pretty strong. After a while I was in the worst kind of giggly mood. "We should get going now, as much as I enjoy listening to Bowie and smoking pot.. but that's not what I'm here for, remember?", I said. "Yeah, we should definitely get going", John smirked. "Hey, not like that", I nudged his shoulder and laughed. "I don't know what you're talking about, but I was referring to playing guitar of course." "Yeah, right." John gave me another smirk and I got the goosebumps. Luckily he stood up to pick up guitars for us. I had felt a slight tension built up inside of me. I couldn't use that again.

He came back and placed one of the acoustic guitars on my lap. "Is there any song you'd like to learn?", he asked. "Yeah, Castles Made of Sand by Jimi." "Woah.. um.. cool song. But that's a toughie." I pouted. "Don't worry.. we'll get there. Maybe you're exceptionally gifted, who knows? You do have the guitar hands", he said and took my hands into his to observe them. 

I could feel my cheeks heating up. I looked at him looking at my hands for what felt like hours. He looked up and directly into my eyes. Ugh I can't take this. "I'll show you what these hands can do", I said and pulled away. The second I said that I noticed how weird it sounded. John's mouth stood open. "Uh... I mean.. guitar-playing-wise. Sorry that sounded so wrong", I laughed awkwardly. "It sounded pretty good to me", John said. Oh god.. I wish he wouldn't have said that. I could see him and me all over each other in my head but abandoned that thought quickly. I have to stop smoking pot. This was not doing me good. "Now, will you teach me playing anytime soon or what?", I said. "Um.. yeah.. sure.."

John grabbed his guitar. "Ok.. so I think I gotta figure how to play that song first and then we'll go this through chord by chord. How does that sound?" I nodded happily. "Sounds just great." I could see he was in deep in thoughts and then suddenly put his guitar back down. "You know what? I'll just get out my Axis record and play that song, that'll be easier. It's been a while since I played Castles." He stood up and searched through his pile of records. I kinda felt like I couldn't stop him when he's set his mind on learning to play that song now, but I gave it a try. "John?", I said. He turned his head but his hands were already grabbing out a pack of records. "You could just start off teaching me something easy, you kn-.." He interrupted me. "Shush, you wanna learn to play that song, I'll teach you to play that song. Easy." And he sat back down on the mattress with all of his Hendrix records. "Wow, well-assorted collection you got there." "Happens when you start hanging in record stores since you were seven", he shrugged. I laughed and shook my head. "You're weird." "Well thanks", he grinned. "Major compliment. That coming from you, Miss Davis, means a lot", he added sarcastically.

I decided to go out and get us some coffee as he was learning to play the Jimi song. In the coffeehouse I bumped into Lee. He looked pretty logy. "Kaya, you're soothing my evening. What are you doing here?", he said and leaned in to kiss me. Was I gonna tell him about John now? I didn't want to cause an awkward situation so I tried to keep it as simple as possible. "Um, I'm getting coffee for me and a friend who's teaching me to play the guitar just recently." "Hey, that's pretty cool. I didn't know you'd play the guitar. You gotta play me a song sometime", he said. There was something in his eyes that made me think he was not that happy about what he's just heard.. but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. "I will", I said.

"And you look bone-tired. Are you okay?" He scratched his head. "Yeah, I'm pretty whacked. I just got myself some coffee and now I'll go and study some more and.. somewhen.. finally go get some sleep.. hopefully. Wish me luck", he grinned. "Luck", I said and kissed his nose. He smiled. "You're cute. Good night, beautiful." "Good night", I said.

"You're an angel", John smiled up to me when I came back with two coffees in my hands. "I know", I answered and handed him his paper cup. He took a sip, placed it on the ground and moved closer to me, sending me shivers. He took the acoustic guitar and handed it to me. Then he took his guitar and placed his fingers on the neck. "Ok, so.. this one's pretty easy. Have a look where I put my fingers and repeat after me." I looked at him helplessly. He put his guitar away and came even closer than he already has. He took my left hand, placed it on the neck. "Hold your fingers still", he said. I did so and he moved them to form a chord. "Guitar hands, I'm telling ya", he smiled. "Now strum." I did but it sounded awful. "Sorry", I said. John laughed. "Don't say you're sorry though, you're just getting started, okay?" I smiled. "You're being so patient with me." "A teacher's got to be patient. And even though I teased you with it, I didn't expect you to be an exceptional talent", he smirked.

At the end of the night I had learned three chords. If it wasn't for John, I'd probably feel bad now for being so damn slow. But I felt good. He really did encourage me to keep going.