Adopted A Fangirl

More Then You Know

"See Ash we care about you don't let one girl get you down cause you have more then 2 million that would kill that girl and say Luke did it"! I laughed and he smirked. Soon we showed up at the house and we all got out and walked in to the see the guys except Zayn and Liam sitting in the living room talking.

"Hey you guys are finally here c'mon the game is on"! Niall yelled and we all sat down. I felt Harry staring at me and it was awkward and scaring me.

"Ya know I'll be right back"! I yelled getting up to go to the bathroom. I locked the door and washed off my face trying to calm down. I went back out and Harry was there.

"Harry go away I am over you I have Ashton"!

"No, Mariah what we had was love please give me another chance"!

"And what you have was your hand to my face and your girlfriend"! I was getting very mad with every word.

"She doesn't matter".

"Well you don't matter to me I am over you"! I stated as I walked downstairs when I got to the bottom Harry grabbed my hand lightly and I flinched.

"I know what I did was wrong but I still love you"!

"Well I can't forgive you, you hit me Harry doesn't matter you were drunk, you don't hit a girl I trusted you"!

"FINE! I don't need you anyone go have fun with your little emo you call a boyfriend"! He laughed and I pushed him against the wall.

"NO ONE TALKS ABOUT ASHTON LIKE THAT"! I yelled in his face and Louis, Ashton, and Michael came running in.

"Mariah come here". Ashton stated and obeyed letting Harry go.

"Harry what are you doing"? Louis asked.

"I still love her"!

"But you hit her, she can forgive you she may never trust you"! Harry's next choice in words hurt both me and Louis

"WHY SHOULD YOU CARE SO MUCH SHE DOESN'T EVEN CALL YOU DAD"?! We all looked shocked, Louis looked over and I nodded as Ashton held me closer.

"YOU WANNA KNOW WHY SHE CANT CALL ME DAD, YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW, WELL WHEN SHE EVEN HAD A FATHER HE WASN'T THERE AND WHEN HE WAS HE CALLED HER FOUL NAMES AND HIT HER, ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY NOW YOU KNOW HER PAST"?! Louis yelled and almost launched at Harry but Michael grabbed him, Harry was still standing there just looking un impressed.

"Your obviously lying if she was abused then Michael would of been too"! He stated in an mater-of-factly tone.

"HARRY, Michael was favored he was planned Mariah wasn't! What the fuck do you want from us, do you want to know every second of what has happened from the moment she was born"?! Louis yelled and I ran upstairs into my room Mikey and Ashton close behind and just sat in my bed crying but I could still hear them yelling. Ashton and Michael came in and closed the door I was now scratching myself, I am worthless, I'm a mistake. Michael came and tried to help me, Ashton obviously knowing I would turn him away.

"Shhhh, it's ok this is Harry's fault not yours". He whispered sweetly as he held me close while I still was scratching myself.

"No, Michael it's over I just want to be happy but something always gets in the way! Why can't I be happy, that's all I want"! I cried.

"You can be happy, we all love you so much"! Ashton stated with worry in his voice. I still heard them yelling I got out of Michael's grip and walked downstairs to see that Harry was throwing stuff and a book came in my direction and hit me in the head, pretty sure I was bleeding but I didn't care I ran up to Harry.

"Listen here Styles! You are going to let me be happy or I will cut your balls off! you put this on yourself"! I yelled in his face then slapped him and walked to the bathroom and Ashton followed me. He came in and set me up on the counter and started cleaning the cut on my forehead.

"Can you give me a rubber band"? I asked about to cry.

"um sure". He handed me one from the draw and I put it around my wrist and started snapping myself.

"Hey don't do that". He stated grabbing my hand.

"It's either this or cut".

"I really don't want you to do either but I guess you can do this". He frowned and went back to cleaning my cut. After he cleaned it he put a band aid on it and I got down and I walked past Harry who was now icing his face I hit him pretty hard I walked up to my room and put on shorts and my 5SOS hoodie and got underneath the covers and just stared at the ceiling until I drifted off into a nightmare.

I was in a black room tied to a chair and standing in front of me was every guy who every did my wrong, past boyfriends, my blood dad, and on the end was Harry I was terrified I was just staring at them with fear when I heard a gunshot and Harry fell, then the others held up guns and pulled the trigger.

I woke up and screamed dripping in sweat and I was crying and I looked at the clock and it was 8 at night, I ran out of bed and when I got out in the hall and Louis was walking over to my door.

"What happened"? He asked and came over giving me a hug and flinched but calmed down.

"Nightmare". Was all I could saw and he nodded.

"Wanna go for a walk"? He asked and I nodded, I got on my toms and he got in his, we walked out the door and he just followed me, I knew where I was going. I hadn't been here in a good while. He didn't ask any questions he just followed and when we came up to the gate he was surprised then remembered gladly the cemetery doesn't close until midnight because if I needed to see anyone it was Nash. I walked up to his grave and sat down Louis standing behind me.

Here lies Nash Will Smith(no pun intended .-.)

"You know I'll be your life, your voice, your reason to be, my love, my heart is breathing for this moment in time. I'll find the words to say before you leave me today"

1997 - 2013

"Hey Nash, sorry I haven't come here in awhile, but it's been nice seeing you in dreams so I didn't find a need to come but today was tuff, Harry kinda found out my past, well not all of it that's for me to know and well you because you know"! I laughed at my awkwardness. I rested my head on the tombstone and started to sing.

"I wanna be last, yeah,

Baby, let me be your,

Let me be your last first kiss,

I wanna be first, yeah,

Wanna be the first to take it all the way like this,

And if you

Only knew.

I wanna be last, yeah,

Baby, let me be your last,

Your last first kiss." I was now crying that was our song, I kissed the tombstone and whispered something before getting up.

"I love you Nash".

Louis put his arm around me as we walked home.

"He meant a lot to you didn't he"?

"More then you know".

_____________________

Hey so finally we have this! Know that all the chapters from when they came home from America without the boys until now were fillers that's why they all sucked and this chapter is my favorite! A lot went down and I have been writing this forever making sure it was perfect and u am really proud of this. This book overall is my favorite that's why I focus on it a lot! I really excited to see the future for the book and these characters I plan on going on for awhile and probably will be a sequel after this book and yeah!

Mariah Xx