Forever and Always Book 2 [A Bensler FanFic]

Chapter 4

The whole night I was nervous. The kids that Elliot and I created out of love, were coming to see me. What would they think?

"Olivia, why aren't you sleeping?" My night nurse asked.

"I'm just restless, Dakota." I mumbled, and she frowned.

"Want some sedation?" She asked, as she wrote down my stats, as I shifted in my bed.

"I don't want to be like that again. My kids are coming in tomorrow, and I want to be alert." I replied, and she nodded.

"Well, why don't I give you some melatonin. It is natural, and it won't leave you confused when you wake up." She spoke, and I nodded slowly.

"Yes, please."

She gave me the medicine, and then I pulled the shirt that Elliot left with me, and I held it close so I could still smell his scent on it. I closed my eyes and let myself fall into a deep sleep.

=+=

Instead of having the kids come into my hospital room, my nurse took me out into the court yard, and she sat to the side, keeping an eye on me, while I waited in my wheelchair for Elliot and the kids.

A few other patients were out here, but many of them looked like they might have a terminal illness. I couldn't imagine how it would feel to know that you are dying. To know that the time you spend with your family might be your last. It would be horrible.

"Mom!" Maureen exclaimed, and I turned my attention to her. I smiled softly, but then I noticed the whole herd of kids behind her, all of them clinging to Elliot, or staying behind him. They were nervous, and so was I.

Maureen came into my view, and blocked the others, as she hugged me. I smiled as she sat down next to me.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, and I sighed.

"I'm feeling okay. I went to physical therapy today, and I walked more. Not a lot, but I shouldn't have to ride in this wheelchair anymore." I spoke, and she smiled. Elliot walked up and kissed my lips, before sitting in the chair in front of me, and I stared at the beautiful kids standing in front of me.

"Um, hi." I spoke, my voice shaking fiercely.

"Hi." The oldest boy spoke, and I could see Elliot in every single bit of him. The only thing that was me, must be the brown hair, that I've seen in all of the family pictures.

"Sam?" I asked, and his eyes lit up.

"You know me, Mommy?" He asked, and the way he said "Mommy" made my heart swell, but I didn't know him. I didn't even know my baby boy.

"Your father has told me everything about you. I'm sorry that I don't really remember you from before the accident." I breathed, and he swallowed hard, before going over to a tree and squatting down. He was playing with a leaf, and I frowned deeply.

I just hurt the little boy who was the first one born to Elliot and myself.

"Mommy, don't frown!" A little girl with curly brown hair exclaimed. I smiled. 

This must be the bubbly Poppy that Elliot spoke so fondly about. She had icy blue eyes, and the cutest little dimples that made me want to just squeeze her chubby little cheeks. Her eyes lit up brightly when she smiled.

"Poppy." I breathed, and she smiled, before crawling onto my lap. She hugged my neck tightly, and I held her close. Just having this little girl hugging me like I still remembered her made me hurt. My heart ached for the memories.

"Mommy, I like your hat. Can I try it on?" She asked, and I chuckled, before slowly peeling it from my head. I placed it on her curls, and she squealed as she climbed down and ran over to a window that looked into the cafeteria, but it was empty, so no one would see her looking at her reflection, a silly smile gracing her face.

Next up was Janey. I knew it was her, because she sat on the ground with a book clutched to her chest. She looked so small, and so scared.

"Janey?" I asked, and she shot her head up. She looked at me, and her eyes were surprised. Oh those eyes.

"Mom?" She asked, and I watched as tears welled in her beautiful eyes.

"Come here." I whispered. She stood up, her legs shaking, before walking slowly over to me. I gently caressed her cheek as she stood in front of me. I could feel her shaking.

"Hi, beautiful." I whispered, and she sniffled, before running her hand over her cheek.

"Hi, Mom." She sniffled, and I pulled her close and kissed her forehead.

I didn't know my kids, but I knew that I needed to reassure them. I needed to tell them that everything was going to be okay, and that I loved them, and I don't think that part of my mind was lost. There was a distinct bond between a mother and her children, and I felt it here with my kids.

=+=

All of my kids, but Sam and Maureen climbed onto my lap and held onto me for dear life. Now, as I sit with Quinn sleeping with her head against my shoulder, I pray for the memories.

I know that I'm not religious by any means, but to give my kids and Elliot the old Olivia back, I would do anything. I just want my family to be completely happy again.

"Mommy, are you sure you don't want some ice cream?" Auggie asked, his adorable face covered in strawberry ice cream.

"No thanks, love. Thanks for asking." I grinned, as I shifted slightly, making Quinn shift in my arms, and her little hands squeezed my bigger one.

Since she had crawled onto my lap, she clung to my hand. It was held tightly to her chest, and I bet she was trying to keep me here with her. It must've been confusing for my kids, since most of them all are still young. I'm just glad that Maureen, is older, so she can help Elliot with the kids. 

I looked around at my kids and closed my eyes as the sounds of them filled the air around me. This was good. This is what I needed.

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