Interview Twenty-Five

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Bluestar sits on her stool and clears her throat.

Bluestar: Hello everyone... today I'm here with one of the most hated cats in all of the warrior fandom. *pauses.* Please welcome... Millie.

A single unenthusiastic whoop replaces the cheering soundtrack that occasionally plays during episodes.

Millie: Hello there Bluestar, how are you?

Bluestar: Pretty horrible since I'm interviewing yo-

Millie suddenly disappears.

Bluestar: Wait what? This isn't in the script...

Cat from offstage: Um, it's a... technical difficulty.

Bluestar: Isn't this episode going live? *hisses at the camera.*

Cat: Fine, one sec...

A commercial comes on the TV, but it abruptly stops a second later, switching back to Bluestar, who's nervously sitting next to Millie.

Millie: *licks a paw and casually draws it over her ears.* Sorry, I died again.

Bluestar: C-care to explain, um, why? Or how? Or what just happened..?

Millie: I had to go protect my Briarlight, obviously... 

Bluestar: Well, that doesn't answer any of my quest-

Millie disappears again.

Bluestar: *eyes narrow.* 

Offscreen Cat: Uh, I did a bit of research online... turns out she's involved in this thing with her son? And he kills her on TV for 'votes'?

Bluestar: That makes less sense than me during my episodes of psychosis and paranoia..

Millie: *reappears; this time out of breath and covered in feathers; is muttering to herself.* Did he really have to drown me with honey? Then stuff my lungs with feathers? That felt rather cruel... oh well, at least Briarlight's okay :(

Bluestar: H-hi?

Millie: *perks up.* Oh, hello! Sorry... that pesky reincarnation keeps interrupting our interview. *disappointed shake of her head.*

Bluestar: Oh, that's, um, fine... don't worry about it... now, let's get back to the interview questions. How did you d-

Millie disappears, and a second later, she reappears, this time coated in a layer of blood.

Millie: *gives her pelt a shake.* He slit my throat! This is getting kind of offensive...

Bluestar: *exasperated.* HOW DID YOU DI-?

Millie disappears.

Bluestar: *starts collecting her papers.* That's it. I'm done. I quit.

Millie: *reappears.* Sorry, what was your question? *shivers slightly.*

Bluestar: I'm not even going to try this time.

Millie: What's wrong? *blinks innocently.*

Bluestar: You keep disappearing before I can get a question out!

Millie: Well, I haven't been reincarnated yet...

Bluestar: Fine. One question. *puts down her papers.* Ho-

Millie: *vanishes.*

Bluestar: *turns toward camera.* Well, I'll see you on the next episode, but this time as an interviewee... I can't take this anymore. 

Millie reappears.

Bluestar: *turns to her and blurts out.* HOW DID YOU DIE?

Millie: *blinks.* Bumblestar killed me.

For a final time, Millie disappears, and Bluestar slumps onto the ground.


by rio xx
(sorry this is late, my computer wasn't working earlier!)

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