-----
Oikawa: *wakes up* oh im alive
Hinata: you better be fcuking thankful you little piece of trash
Oikawa: . . .
Hinata: . . . Oh shit
Hinata: that wasn't what I'm supposed to say was it
Oikawa: . . . *cough* Tch.
Hinata: WHAT?
Oikawa: you interrupted my submersion.
Hinata: you wanted to commit suicide?!
Oikawa: yeah
Hinata: why?!
Oikawa: dunno. it's what the story says. . .
( director: *facepalm* )
Hinata: ugh, get it over with, I'm hungry you bish
Oikawa: me too
Oikawa: so what would you like?
Oikawa: coffee?
Oikawa: tea?
( director: hoe no )
Oikawa: . . . Or me?
Iwaizumi ( is kunikida ): *from the distance* THERE YOU AAAAAAAAARE SHITTYKAWAAAA
Hinata: found ur boyfriend
Oikawa: iwa-chan, treat him to a meal!
Iwaizumi: YOU do
Oikawa: nevar
----
Hinata: *eating meat buns*
Iwaizumi: . . .
Hinata: . . .
Oikawa: so
Iwaizumi: I'm behind my schedule hurry up
Hinata: *talking with his mouth full*
Iwaizumi: HOW TF AM I SUPPOSED TO UNDERSTAND THIS, DIRECTOR?!
( director: . . . Why is my cast like this )
----
- time skip blahblah and then that part where dazai nullifies atsushi's weretiger powers -
Oikawa: hell yeah baby
Iwaizumi: *comes running* what
Oikawa: the director said--
( director: SHUT UP )
Oikawa: . . .
Iwaizumi: . . . Uh. . . Thanks to you, I ended up bringing unnecessary people.
Kiyoko: *is yosano*
Yamaguchi: *is that guy who has super strength that is like a modified version of finny from kuroshitsuji*
Kuroo: *is actually ranpo*
( director: this is why hinata shouldn't have mentioned him earlier about the abs )
Oikawa: *drags hinata like a sack of potatoes* ur joining us, little guy. In the Armed Detective Agency.
----
( episode 2 )
Terushima: *is tanizaki* COME ANY CLOSER AND I'LL BLOW THIS BLASTED BUILDING UP WITH MY SUPER-SAIYAN BOMB
( director: *gave up on trying to correct their lines* )
Lev: *is naomi*
---- timeskip ----
Iwaizumi: HURRY THE BOMB WILL BLOW UP!
Hinata: *searching around frantically* uhhhhh. . .
Hinata: *sees lev*
Lev: *sees hinata*
Hinata: . . . *makes the face atsushi had when he saw naomi like he's panicking*
Hinata: *shoves lev towards the bomb*
Lev: *successfully covers the bomb without trying because of his height*
Hinata: . . . *walks out of the building in a lax manner*
Bomb: *blows up for real*
Lev: *rest in pieces* *literally*
Director: this is my revenge i hate you all this cast is a disaster imma find someone else to play this out for me! *stomps out of room*
Yaku: . . . But lev is
Kuroo: fortunately
Yaku: dead
Kenma: . . .
Kenma: oh yeah baby
Whole HQ: *parties*
- and someone named shamrock ( servamp ) hands yaku a bomb in a silver briefcase and they all blow up. The end. -
****
Ok so this is more like something I should've put on the Haikyuu Random Stuff book but oh well
YOU ARE READING
haikyuu headcanons
Fanfictioni wrote this as a deluded 14 year old who thought i was important. read if you will but don't let it determine your impression of my humor; i'm actually funny guys (lies). i'm better now (lies).
bungo stray crows
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