Confused » Jelsa AU

15

Elsa Winters

[F L A S H B A C K S]

"So, what university would you like to go?"

That question had been circulating in our conversation for the past month. My high school days were over and now, I am stuck in choosing what university I'll be entering to. I've took a couple of exams from universities that are near from our residence and if not, near the town—and to be perfectly honest, I never find these schools fit for me. It has been always the problem in choosing schools, not because I have unpleasant grades but I usually get involved to fights, which made my records a little bit appalling.

"The Weaslton's had told me that the Evergreen Institute is an exquisite one. The school offers the course that you'll be taking and they excel at it." Father continued.

Here we go again, discussing about the course that I'll be taking. My parents wanted me to take law and become a lawyer one day, so that someone would defend them in case that their business would go upside down. They've been pressuring me since I stepped into eighth grade about taking law. But, I never wanted to do anything with law. I hate this damn country and most importantly, I do not wish to work under them. They knew what I want; they knew what my heart desires after I graduate high school.

"I've read the letter yesterday and it was said that you had passed Evergreen's exam." Mother chimed up, causing me to shake my head in disagreement.

"I won't be going to that stup–"

"You'll be going to Evergreen Institution whether you like it or not." Father added, his voice went a decibel higher.

Then, why bother ask me on what university I would like to go?

"Whatever."

Right after that word rolled off my tongue, the set of silverware that were peacefully on the table flew off and landed on the cold marble floors. Plates shattered and the silver spoons clanked–the sound was terrifying. But not for me.

My gaze immediately flew back to my father, seeing him all red in anger–which made my ever-so rebellious side grin.

I had irritated the bastard.

"We raised you as the perfect daughter. We enrolled you to schools that are known for their excellence. We let you go to that ballet class even though it was nothing but a useless waste of time. We provided you everything you wishe–"

"That's where you are wrong, my dear daddy." I spoke up, rolling my eyes. "You may have enrolled me to great schools and gave me a shelter that anyone would want. But you never ever provided me the things I wanted. You never listened to my decisions. You never supported me in anything!"

"I would never support you because of your rebellious lesbian ass!"

"See, you don't even support who I truly am! What kind of parent are you?" I sneered.

"I only want nothing but the best for you Elisanna!"

"Best for me? Are those things best for me–all those luxurious materials that cost a whole company? I don't need those. What I need is your support, yours and my mother's support to whatever my decisions are!"

"You are not in the right position to say those things, Elsa!"

"Why, just because I am your daughter, you could treat me like shit? Well, guess what, I am tired of being your perfect little Barbie doll and I am not going to that dammned school whether you like it or not!"

"Who are you to say those things?! Let me just remind you, you are nothing if your birth certificate isn't stamped with my last name!" He shouted, voice booming through the thin walls. On my peripheral vision, I could see my mother tremble in fear with her hands clasped to her chest, where her favorite locket dangles. She's just like my father yet less cruel and powerful. She also never supported any of my independent decisions, not even once. Weakling.

"It's just a fucking name, it doesn't concern anybody."

"Don't you hear the words you just uttered, the words that proved that you're nothing but a daughter of a bastard!"

"I am glad that you admitted that you're the bastar–"

"You were not born with my blood running in your veins. You're not my daughter!"

***

The rain poured outside her house with the droplets hitting the roof, creating noise that soothes my soul down. She kissed me affectionately, her delightful lips gliding down my bare body. Body on top of mine, she provided warmth with her curvy body that never failed to make me feel the highs. The voice of hers that calmed the storm I had inside. Her soft finger tips ran down my skin, caressing every inch of it and giving me love that my parents could never provide.

Lying on the scattered and messy sheets, I hugged her body, never wanting to let go. She made me feel important. She made me the strong woman I am now. She's the last and the only one that makes me alive. She's the reason why I wake up every morning. She's the reason why I hadn't given up on life.

Our skin touched each other–her warm silky skin on my cold pale one. I could hear her heartbeat and her breathings while she played with my fingers. "I wish we're always like this." She muttered, bringing my cold fingers to her lips and kissed it delicately. I sighed, listening to the rhythm of our heartbeats that screamed each other's name.

My heart screams for Astrid only and her heart screams for my name.

"Do not listen to them, Elsa. Your parents are just too closed minded."

"You're right. They never even tried to listen to me." I sighed, placing a small kiss on her back. I smiled. "I love you so much." I whispered, only enough for the two of us to hear.

"Me too, baby. I love you too."