Bite Size Stories

Infanticide

*** *** Weekend Write-In for 4th August 2017 *** ***

"evidence": In 500 words, tell what happens when there is evidence.

Dear diary,

Further evidence has presented itself that the foul matriarch intends to do away with me, most ... foully. Well let me tell you that the red headed hag's plans will be thwarted and I, Stuart Griffin shall seize the day. It shall be my Waterloo and Lois my Napoleon. She shall rue the day I was ever born. Hmmm, perhaps she already does! Hence the diabolical machinations at hand - there has been a systematic and systemic campaign to make sure I do not see my second birthday!

It started when the vile woman took me off of my bottle and introduced the so called 'solids' - in retrospect a deliberate ploy to weaken my immune system and slowly poison me with mashed up bits of ... disgusting vomit inducing muck, that I wouldn't feed to the dog, is what!! Heh heh, actually I did attempt to rid myself of the demonic sustenance called 'brussels' (that Lois claimed would be good for me. HAH!) by using my mnemonic defiblirator device to liquify the foul sludge and introduce it to the dog's bottle of the rather curiously named Jack Daniels.

Note to self: Find and congratulate Mr Jack Daniels on his ingenious brew and explore the possibilities of utilizing the concoction to render the population docile and thus subject to my control!

Ah but I digress! With her pathetic attempts to introduce the so called 'greens' to my system, an obvious failure (Oh yes, the fiendish 'brussels' were but the first foray of the redheaded harridan - I have had to deal with other insipid poisons designed to weaken me and sap my will, such as cucumber and the bizarrely colored carrots - hardly a 'green' eh Lois? Which just goes to show that the maternal tormentor, while intelligent seeming compared to the fatman and my corpulent brother Chris, is by far my intellectual inferior!) the vile woman has upped her game.

Note to self - What is in the 'shots'? Who is the mysterious man in the white coat? Could he be part of the same fraternity of controlling psychopaths who have plagued my existence since my escape from the Overian bastille?? The original man in the white coat had the audacity to hang me upside down and slap my hind quarters. VENGEANCE SHALL BE MINE!!

Lastly, I must remember to resist the so called sweeties or lollipops the white coated monster gives me, after the 'shots' - I am absolutely positive they contain some kind of mind dampening agent, designed to confuse my thoughts and distract me from the fact that I am being slowly poisoned by Lois. Well, woman, two can play at that game - enjoy your evening vin rouge you drunken tart!! HA HAH!!!

I shall return tomorrow with an update on the results of my analysis of the samples I shall very shortly steal from the man in white's office. But for now dear diary, Rupert and I are meeting two rather lovely dollys across the room for tea and tiffin. Don't wait up!