Chapter Thirty-Seven

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On a usual day, I would put effort into coming up with some form of disguise, to prevent drawing attention to myself, but today, I couldn't be bothered. I wasn't going to worry about a disguise when my brother and sister were dead.

Besides, I had not been recognised before. I would not be recognised this time. Why would I? Until the last year or so, I was simply the third daughter of the Pharaoh – out of six. Even when it was just Meritaten and I, I hardly spent time in the public eye.

I was confident I would not be recognised, although, truth be told, I didn't give it much thought. I didn't give it much thought at all.

But I knew that now, this would be the last time I had the luxury of remaining anonymous. After today, everyone in all of Egypt would know who I was. This could be the last time I was able to wander the streets of Akhetaten like a citizen of the city. This could be the last time I was ever alone, by myself.

This could be the last time, for all I knew, that I even saw my friends. Ay had made his opinion about Kahmose and Huy quite clear, and as Queen, I would be under constant guard. Even as Queen, there was a high chance I would not be permitted to see them. This could very well be the last time.

The very thought sent pains into my already broken heart, and bought tears to my already dried eyes. I didn't think I could cry anymore, but the thought of losing Kahmose had proven me wrong.

The streets, dirty and dusty, were empty for the most part, with only a few people wandering around. Some were quiet; others chattered happily, without a care in the world – completely ignoring the fact that their Pharaoh and Queen had just been blatantly murdered before their eyes.

I was still dressed in my royal regalia and headdress, so I made sure to keep my head down and avoid eye contact, just in case anyone gave me a second glance.

But nobody did. Everyone was just minding their own business. Which, in some ways, was a relief.

My brother and sister were dead.

There were once six of us – six girls; six sisters. And now, one by one, they had all been whittled down...until I was the only one left.

Was this Aten's plan? Was this part of my plan, my life plan? My fate, my destiny? Why would Aten be so cruel as to bless me with a large, loving family – only to then take them all away from me? Tutankhaten was the only one I had left now. What kind of god punished us with so much pain? What kind of god let his followers suffer?

Maybe Aten wasn't the god we believed he was. Maybe my father's quixotic ideal was not such a good one after all.

I tried to shake these treacherous thoughts out of my heart. Such blasphemy! I was the Queen! I could not dare be thinking such traitorous things! But as much as I tried to forget them, the thoughts still lingered within me.

I knocked on the small, wooden door that separated my friends' house from the street. No answer. I knocked again, feeling the hard timber against my knuckles – more urgently this time.

Still no answer.

Cursing myself, I turned around, kicking up a cloud of dust from the ground. I had forgotten to consider the possibility that Kahmose and Huy had not returned from the festivities yet. I couldn't just wait for them to come back. Someone back at the palace would notice my absence. And what if someone noticed me?

Just as I was about to give up and return home in despair, a loud, creaking noise from behind me made me turn around in surprise and hope. Sure enough, the small, oval face of my dear friend Huy peered around the corner of the slightly-opened door in fright. Seeing it was only me, her face melted into relief.

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