Endless Tears in Every Heartache [Completed:2016 ]

Chapter Thirty- Five

"Allain..." Ang unang lumabas sa bibig ko makalipas ang ilang minuto. Tumitig ako sa kanya. Marami akong gustong itanong. Siya lang ba ang nakakalam nito?

Am I just too clueless about the things around me? Why didn't I noticed it. We have this resemblance. When I look at his eyes, I think I can see myself because of him. The boy version of myself.

"Does he know about it?" I asked him. Umiling lamang siya.

Ilang minuto siyang muling tumitig sa akin. Pinalis niya rin ang luhang kumawala sa kanyang mga mata. I honestly don't know what to feel.

"I don't know...I don't know what to say. I didn't see this one coming." Bahagya siyang tumungo. "I am in love with you. I love you but knowing you're my half sister makes it even harder for me. Why are our lives tangled this way?" Nalulungkot ako. I know when we separate ways, he's hurt even though he didn't say it.

"Do you know you have a half sister?" Tumango siya. "And Allain doesn't really know about it?" Muli kong tanong. Tumango ulit siya.

"We've been best of friends. But we don't talk too much about each other's lives. We're just contented that we got each other's back." I felt sorry for him. I hope it was just a dream. But this isn't.

"I'm really sorry...K-kuya...Ford." This makes even more awkward for the both of us.

"I know I have a half sister but I have no idea it was you. Because if I only  knew, I shouldn't have fell for you." My heart aches so much seeing him this way.

This is what I felt for him, long time ago. A sister's love for him.

Tumalikod siya mula sa akin. Nakita ko ang pagtaas-baba ng balikat niya. Umiiyak na naman siya at hindi ko alam ang dapat kong gawin.

"K-Kuya...K-Kuya..." Lalapitan ko na sana siya.

"Please don't..." Tila tinutukoy niya ang paglapit ko sa kanya kaya tumigil ako. "Give me a break. I just can't...I can accept you as my sister...but not now. Fuck this life. Why do I have to fell in love with my own sister?!" He messed with his hair out of frustration.

Napatungo na lamang ako habang patuloy sa pagbagsak ang mga luha ko. Tahimik lamang akong umiiyak sa likuran niya.

"I just confessed weeks ago. And then this. Don't you think it's too much?" Hindi ako sumagot. Damang-dama ko kasi ngayon ang sakit na nararamdaman niya. It will never be easy for him. I don't really understand why do we have to fall for someone who can't love us back. And why do we have this twisted kind of life.

Unti-unti siyang naglakad palayo sa akin. I didn't follow him. He asked for a break, it is just right to respect his decision. He's just a man who fell in love for the wrong person.

Ivan sit beside me.

"I didn't see Allain today and the other day." Nag-angat ako ng tingin sa kanya at binaba sandali ang script na binabasa ko. Nagtataka akong tumitig sa kanya.

"Ha?" Wala sa sariling tanong ko.

"I mean for the past 3 years I've seen him watching you from afar." Namilog ang mga mata ko. "You didn't know?" Umiling ako. Teka... "I thought you know About it, he was just that far." May tinuro siyang distansya na hindi kalayuan sa pwesto naming dalawa. Napatakip ako ng bibig dahil sa hindi ako makapaniwala. "He was always there...watching you."

Natulala na lamang ako sa malayong distansiya na iyon. At tila nagkaroon ako ng imahinasyon, nakangiti, malungkot habang pinapanood ako nang hindi ko nalalaman.

For months, I have done the same things. Photoshoot, interview, mall shows, Asian tour, tapings. I go straight to my unit after everything's done.