The Redemption of Severus Snape

Part 65

Trust—that was a word Severus took very seriously; the rash employment of it could mean a death sentence for a spy like himself. He slid the pillow off his lap towards Lin, who picked up the baby.

"What are you doing?" said Lin and Severus pointed to the bathroom. He wanted to gargle. Lin rose and let Severus slip his legs off the bed. His right leg was sore for some reason. Lin put her hand under his arm, but he pushed it away. "Let me help you."

"I don't need help."

"You need your crutches."

"Rubbish!" Severus didn't know what she was talking about. He didn't have or need crutches. He rose with much more difficulty than he'd expected. He felt horrible and wondered if he'd been cursed. He strode slowly and unsteadily toward the bathroom, but didn't make five feet and had to stop and rest. He remained standing, but he allowed Lin to take his arm and steady him. "What's wrong with me?"

"You were hurt badly in the Battle of Hogwarts—"

"What? It happened?" Severus tried to say more, but his voice gave out and he couldn't utter another sound.

"I'll explain everything once you're settled. Are you hungry?" Severus nodded. He was more than hungry; he was famished. "Molly's made an excellent dinner, and there's plenty left over. I'll bring you something."

Severus made it into the bathroom and immediately grabbed hold of the sink to steady himself.

"Do you need help?"

"I know how to use the loo!"

Lin remained composed. Severus could be as grouchy as he liked. Lin was too thrilled to have him back to care about his attitude. "I'll wait outside. Knock if you need help."

Severus reached to open the medicine cabinet and stopped to stare at himself in the mirror. He almost didn't recognize himself. The short hair could easily be remedied, but his skin looked paper thin and his cheeks were horribly sunken. His eyes traveled down to his neck where he saw numerous frightful scars. Memories began to flood into his mind. He felt his arms pinned to his sides. He heard the Dark Lord's high voice in his ears. There was a flash of motion and then searing pain in his neck. He couldn't breathe. Nagini coiled around his head; she struck him again and again and...

"Severus, are you alright? Knock twice on something if you are."

Severus wrapped his knuckles twice on the wall. He studied his hands; even his fingers were too thin. His forearms looked wasted. He lifted his nightshirt over his head and stared in disbelief at his alien-looking body. Severus was naturally slim, and his ribs had always been somewhat visible, but now he almost looked like a living Inferius. The skin between his ribs was deeply sunken, and his waist was pulled away from his hip bones. He couldn't bear to look at himself and pulled the nightshirt over his hideously emaciated body.

Lin heard the toilet flush and Severus gargling; a few seconds later, he opened the door. His hair was shoulder length again, and Lin assumed he used a spell to lengthen it because she didn't have a Manegro potion in the bathroom cupboard. Lin was concerned about his pallor. She told him to sit on the lounge, and she'd bring a plate up to him.

Severus insisted on going downstairs. He leaned against the doorjamb while Lin fetched him a pair of black slippers he'd never seen before, claiming they were his. She wrapped a dark-green, cotton, dressing gown around him and claimed that, that was also his. Lastly, she helped him get his crutches under his arms. He hated to admit it, but he was glad to have them. Lin picked the fussing baby out of his bassinet for the second time and walked with Severus to the staircase.

"Minerva charmed the stairs so you wouldn't fall—"

"I'm not a bloody toddler!" Severus put out his hand and felt the air around the top of the stairs. Lin didn't know what he'd felt or sensed, but it soured his mood even further. He pulled his wand from his sleeve and flicked it roughly. Minerva's charm broke with a loud, short-lived, sizzling sound.