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He said he couldn’t even be the typical one .
I wanted to say ,
“ That’s because you’re the
grand one ” ,
but instead I chose to say ,
“ There’s nothing grand
in being typical ,
there’s grandness in being . .
different . ”
I guess I never stopped being uncomfortable
about showing him
how much I admired him -
the way he existed ,
in my life ,
and in this world .
But ,
right now ,
this very moment ,
I feel like being recklessly
brave enough to say
out loud in bold aureate letters ,
“ You’re grand .
You’re the grandest man
I’ll ever know ,
because I will be there
when you’ll grow up to be one ,
when you’ll grow up to be a man ,
I hope I’ll be there to see you
grow up .
I hope .
I’ve seen you grow from
a boy to a guy .
And , I’d very much like
to see you grow up to be a man ,
I’d very much fancy to see you
in your twenties and
thirties and forties
and fifties and as long as your existence will prevail .
Did I ever tell you
how your eyes sparkle ?
Maybe I did already .
They’re like lamp posts
on a dark desolate street ;
I see a good soul in there ,
inside you ,
through that pair of eyes ,
did I ever tell you that
I was intently gazing at you writing silently that morning in the library ? Well , I didn’t , did I ?
I was studying how your fingers held that pen and how docilely you carved each word and turned each page ,
I couldn’t help but
just keep staring .
I’m lucky you didn’t
catch me smiling .
Hey ,
did I ever tell you
how magnificent you were ?
I must have ,
a million times ,
inside my mind
and maybe a few times
out loud too .
But ,
I maybe never said to you ,
how much I envied you ,
how much I envied you being
such a pretty soul ,
how much I wished to be like you , how much I tried to become like you , how much I looked up to you ,
how much high I thought of you ,
how much guilt I carried for being with you even after knowing
how dark my demons were ,
or maybe ,
I said all these to you too .
Hey ,
did I ever tell you
I thought
you were a beautiful soul
and a grand man
and a very handsome personality
and a good human
not because
I had fallen in love with
how you crossed your arms
or how your fingers were so perfectly long , and bony and tough and
how you had a stitch mark on the pointer of your right hand ,
but because ,
you truly genuinely legitimately honestly amazingly perfectly factually were one .
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[If this girl's words have
touched your soul ,
matter not how faint
the sensation felt ,
would you mind dears ?
if she wished for you to tap on that minuscule star beneath
and send kudos to her ,
please ?] :)
YOU ARE READING
into her phenakistoscope
Poetry«« when her life was at a halt , an illusion of motion was created and in her dreamlike state , her reality and her imagination met and gave her a blurred vision , her phantasmagoria took birth where her soul saw dreams of a...
