You Did What?

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“You did what?” I asked, frozen in shock.

“I had an abortion” Eden said bluntly.

“When was this?”

“Three or four months ago”

“And you only just thought to tell me?”

“I didn’t think you’d be that bothered”

“Eden, of course I’m bothered, you were pregnant

Eden nodded. “And now I’m not”

“Didn’t you think it might be a good idea to tell me you were pregnant first?”

“Why? So we could talk it out and keep it? I’m not ready for a baby, Hadley”

“I could’ve come with you”

I wouldn’t have been happy about it, but I would’ve been there for her. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about pro-choice and all that, but that wasmy child. It would’ve been nice to at least be told that I’d managed to get her knocked up. After all, I love Danny and Lily to pieces and I wouldn’t change them for the world, but they weren’t mine biologically, and that was what I’d always wanted. Kids of my very own. Kids with the trademark good looks of the Smith family, not that Danny and Lily weren’t total cuties.

“Thanks, Hadley, but I’m a big girl, I don’t need you to hold my hand”

Okay, now that hurt.

I should probably explain what’s going on. See, when Eden had that stomach bug the other day, she didn’t have a stomach bug; she was pregnant. And since the kids had been ill at the time, she had the perfect cover when she found out she was pregnant. Well, I say when she found out. She sort of had this feeling that she was pregnant, and then her little trip to the hospital confirmed it. She’d said she hadn’t wanted to do a home test in case she forgot to get rid of it and either me or one of the kids found it. Well I feel loved, huh. And then that day she’d gone out and come back all pale was the day she’d had the abortion.

“Besides, you already have two kids, you don’t need another one”

“Eden, you know I love kids, and we’re not exactly struggling for money”

“I love kids too, but I’m too young to have one of my own”

“Do Danny and Lily not count, then?”

“Of course they count, I just-”

“So what’s so different about having one that’s ours?”

“Hadley, I’m not talking about this anymore. I don’t want kids yet, end of story” she said harshly before storming off.

I know I was being a bit of a dick about it, but can you blame me? I just found out my girlfriend had my own flesh and blood killed. Okay, maybe “killed” is the wrong word, but it was still my flesh and blood. And if I’m honest, it was the fact that she hadn’t told me anything about any of it until now that was bothering me. Not the abortion, not the argument it had just caused, the fact that she hadn’t told me she was pregnant and the fact that she waited months to tell me she’d had an abortion. Months.

The weeks that followed Eden’s news were... awkward to say the least. I didn’t want to be anywhere near her, and she just wanted me to get over it, which funnily enough wasn’t going to happen any time soon. I mean, I could respect her opinion and the fact that she didn’t want kids of her own yet, but not telling me? Seriously? And it was during one particularly tense meal that things between me and Eden sort of... well, dropped dead, I suppose.

Thankfully the kids were over at John’s for the evening since Beau had invited them over, because I honestly would’ve died a little bit inside if they’d been there to see me and Eden arguing. After all, all I’d wanted for them was a happy family, and arguing parents doesn’t equal a happy family.

I’d made dinner and though we were eating at the dinner table, I was doing a pretty good job of ignoring her. Eden was glaring at me while she ate, and I’d done my fair share of glaring back when she slammed her cutlery down on the table.

"What is your fucking problem?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about" I said, feigning ignorance.

"You're being so childish. I'm sick of it"

"I'm not being childish" I was beingverychildish.

"Ignoring me for two weeks isn't childish?"

"Can you blame me?"

"Yes!" she yelled and I glared at her. "What? I'm told you I’m not ready for a baby. What else was I going to do, Hadley?"

"You could've at least told me you were pregnant"

"Why did I have to tell you? If you hadn't found out you wouldn't have cared in the first place"

"Because that was my child, Eden. We've been through this already"

"You're driving me fucking insane. I've had enough of this, and you" she said, getting up.

I got up as well, more out of habit than anything.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but you’re acting like a child. You’re being spiteful and mean and that’s not the man I fell in love with. I’m leaving, Hadley”

"For how long?"

“For however long it takes you to stop being such an ass about it"

"I wouldn't be being such a dick if you'd told me about all this before you went and got an abortion"

"Why does it even matter anymore? It's done now. Just grow up and get over it" she said, storming off to pack her bags.

I flopped myself down on the couch grumpily, sulking my way into oblivion as I heard Eden packing. I didn’t want to lose her over this, but I couldn’t forgive her. I know I should have, but I just... I couldn’t let it go. I watched as Eden left without saying anything else and set about angrily cleaning once she’d gone.

John, forgive me if I coerce you into angry sex when you bring the kids home.

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