DON'T LET ME GO ► BELLAMY BLAKE

07

Morning arrived and Loxy slowly aroused from her sleep, suppressing a yawn as she clambered to her feet. She could hear quiet mutters coming from the center of camp, near Bellamy's tent.

"What are we going to tell Loxy?" A voice spoke, causing Loxy's ears to prick like an animal. Her curiosity sprouted and she began lumbering towards the source of the sound.

Before she could make it a body blocked her, cutting off her vision from what was in front of her. "Loxy, please just, stay back," Bellamy begged, his voice somewhat strict under a small layer of hurt.

"Get out of my way, Amy," Loxy hissed while shoving him away, strutting past him and towards Clarke and Finn. The two were standing over a body, discussing something deeply.

Loxy moved closer to see who's body it was, and she felt her heart shatter into a million pieces when she did. It was like an iron fist had taken her heart and squeezed it until it dissolved into nothing. She was staring at her best friend's dead body. "Wells..."

Clarke spun around in alarm, her eyes widening when she saw it was Loxy. "I am so sorry," she began, taking a step towards her.

"No," Loxy backed up a few paces, holding her hand out shakily. "I-I just need to be alone," she quickly excused herself before the tears began falling. She didn't want to get caught crying in front of anyone ever again. Bellamy was right about what he said two nights ago. Weakness is death, and she couldn't afford to look weak.

Plunging into the forest, the first thing Loxy did was go to where she last talked to him; where she broke apart in his arms whilst he helped start to put her back together. Now she had no one to finish putting the pieces together.

A huge sob built up in Loxy's throat as she slid down against a tree trunk, hugging her knees. She tried to remember every vivid detail from last night, and from all the nights before. Wells was one of the only people who knew the truth about her. Now only Bellamy and the team on the Ark that worked on her knew.

You should tell Clarke. His voice appeared in her mind, and she could almost imagine him speaking to her in that moment. She could see his soft brown eyes as he reassured her that he would always be there for her.

But I wasn't there for you. It's my fault you're dead. Loxy thought to herself, hot tears spilling onto her cheeks at a fast rate. She placed a hand over her mouth to stop the loud sobs from coming. Physical pain was a pain she had grown tolerant too, but nothing could ever wash away the horrible pain of sadness. It was something you could never rid of.

"Red?" A tiny voice called out. Bellamy walked through the woods, his eyes softening when he saw her. "I just wanted to make sure you didn't go out and get taken by Grounders,"

"I almost wish they would. Everyone I care about always ends up dead or hurt," Loxy whispered, before remembering her promise about being strong. She slid her legs down, wiping the last tears away and taking in a huge breath. "You and Wells are the only other ones that knew besides Abby's team."

Bellamy nodded, taking a seat next to her. "I could see how close you two were. I'm sorry for being such a dick to him sometimes. You once told me I couldn't credit him for what his father did. And you were right. He was a good man, unlike Jaha." He spoke, but Loxy knew he was talking mainly to try to distract himself, not reassure her.

"It's my fault he's dead." She deadpanned, keeping her eyes on the trees to avoid Bellamy's eyes. "We were talking last night, and if I hadn't left him when I did I could've stopped whoever killed him."

"You can't possibly be blaming yourself right now," Bellamy mumbled, scooting closer to her which made her shrink away. "Atom's death, Wells's death, none of it was your fault."