stone cold // tronnor au

twenty-one

Connor's POV

The next day, I had my free period first, which was good, because I had no intention of getting out of bed. After my picnic and almost-kiss with Troye yesterday, I wasn't in a hurry to go outside and talk to anyone. The only bad thing, was that I had English straight after with him, which meant that I'd just have to avoid him for the rest of the morning and everything would be fine.

Hopefully.

To say I was confused with my feelings for him was an understatement. Before yesterday, I was so sure I saw Troye as nothing more than a friend. But now, I wasn't so sure.

If he was just my friend, would it still be considered normal for me to have butterflies in my stomach every time I saw him?

If I really didn't have any romantic feelings towards him, how was I supposed to explain the smile he brought to my face every time we were together?

The truth was, I couldn't.

Honestly, the only thing stopping me from accepting my feelings for him was my original hatred for him. Not just my hatred itself, but the reason for it.

How many different boys had gotten close to Troye, and developed feelings for him, only to be left heartbroken?

I sighed, and shook my head. To him, I was probably just another boy that he'd keep around until he got bored. And really, I didn't want to go through the heartbreak I experienced with Matthew all over again.

I rolled over, and laid face down on my bed. The worst thing about all of this, was that I still had to continue tutoring him, whether I liked it or not. With a frustrated scream into my pillow, I decided that I'd have to pretend that nothing was wrong, otherwise our tutoring sessions would be even more awkward.

Which meant that, no matter how fast my heart would beat around him, I'd just have to put on a fake smile, and fight the urge to intertwine his fingers with mine.

---

Half an hour later, I dragged myself out of bed, and to the bathroom. After brushing my teeth and splashing water onto my face to wash away my frustrating thoughts, I put on a clean pair of black jeans and a maroon sweater.

"Just act like nothing's wrong." I reminded myself, as if it would actually help.

I grabbed my phone and school bag, before walking out of the door, and into the hallway. As if the universe was against me, Troye stepped out of his room at the exact same time. Completely forgetting what I'd told myself about acting normal, I gaped at him and turned away.

Much like a meerkat scurrying to find food, I hurried away in the opposite direction, although it meant that I'd have to end up taking the long way to class.

"Um, don't you need to lock your door?" Troye asked, making me turn around.

I rubbed my eyebrow as a subtle facepalm, before walking back to lock my door.

"Thanks." I mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

So much for acting normal.

"Hey, uh, Connor?" He said quietly, before I could turn away again.

"Yeah?" I raised my eyes up to his.

"Do you want to walk to class together?" He asked hesitantly, tilting his head to the side.

He had a nervous look on his face, as if he was half expecting me to shoot him down. I dropped my shoulders, and realised this would be only only chance to get things back to the way things were.