*Simons POV*
i don't know whats worse, isolation all day or isolation all day with josh. right now me and josh are not on good terms because of his actions with that bitch freya yesterday. (ily freya sorry had to use you for the story xD) i spent most of last night crying into my pillow, i didn't eat breakfast or lunch or dinner this morning. i hardly slept at all for the duration of the night. i just let my hair flop down messily and i wore dark black skinny jeans and a very over sized sidemen tester hoodie with the hood up to hide as much of me as i physically could.
I took the back route to get to school, i wasn't prepared to see josh yet, i couldn't. i usually listen to some grime in the morning to get me pumped up before school, today i took the sadder approach listening to Shawn Mendes and Justin Bieber. i wasn't prepared to be hyped while he was staring at me. i had zero energy to put up with him today.
i approached the steel gates that were spray painted a dark blue a couple of minutes away from school. as i walked past the tons of laughing and excitable school kids all i could think about was all the memories with josh and what my next move could possibly be. could i ever forgive him for his actions?
"si, wait up" i heard from behind me, quietly though as i did have headphones. i couldn't hear them clear enough to figure out who it was. i pulled out both of my earphones via the lead and turned my head, my right eyes vision getting blocked because of my hood being up.
"how comes you are walking this way" the body finally caught up to me and i recognised them instantly, harry.
"just something happened between me and... you know what it doesn't matter" i shook off, not wanting to tell him anything about mine and joshs relationship.
"no go on, you and who?" he questioned. they are all going to find out one way or another and i would prefer to have my side of the story and my feelings about the situation out there as well.
"me and josh" i breathed out sort of regretting telling him.
"what? i thought you to were all lovely dovey?" he said with his voice a higher pitch indicating he was surprised. his face was scrunched up and he leant his head back, also in surprise.
"what do you mean?"
"i saw the way you looked at him, i saw the way you to were cuddled up after jj's party, i know you were seeing each other more than any of the other sidemen and finally i saw yesterday morning with you being so cute and adorable to him."
he was right, i guess we weren't really hiding our intimacy over the easter break. why should we though? they are all our mates and they should respect our sexualities, religion, thoughts, beliefs, whatever. thats what friends do, accept each other no matter what. and if they did not respect or accept how you are well then they really aren't your mate.
"i guess we didn't hide it well" i spoke, finally breaking my trance from the floor.
"why should you? its all cool with me man. you two are both fit and good looking you are perfect for each other" he laughed "and the way you were together was so cute."
wait... did he just call me fit and good looking? i just laughed softly him.
"so whats happened then?" harry inquired.
"well tobi and i came out of second period and was on our way to the vending machine to get me a drink of water. when we turned the corner, outside of the dinner hall, there he was lips all over freya in a deep kiss, holding her arse like i didn't even exist. they pulled away and he kissed her one more time before heading over to us."
i felt a tear roll down my cheek from recapping the twisted events of yesterday.
"I just ran, i couldn't face him after that. how could i? he betrayed me" i exclaimed the last bit. "he tried turning it round and making it out like i was the bad guy"
"dick move" he shot back shaking his head.
"and now i have to spend the whole day with him in isolation." i sighed thinking about today and what is to come.
"wait so what are you?"
"sorry?"i questioned.
"gay, bi, pan, anything else?" harry asked.
to be honest i didn't know how to answer, bi or gay? it didn't really matter to be honest i knew i liked boys but i didn't know if i still likes girls in anyway, i mean there is no simple test you can take to find out if you did or not.
"i think i am bi for now as in i know i like guys but not sure if i still like girls, if you get me"
"bi curious"
"yeah that" i smiled at him.
"love you man, whatever you are" he engulfed me into a hug, which i needed if i am being honest, i needed one of joshes hugs. god how i miss him already.
Words: 880
Published: 12/08/16
Edited:
