Serendipity | Jax Teller

Unspoken

Despite his love for Delilah's silky hair, he was glad she had it up in a bun as it gave him unrestricted access to her jaw and her neck and before he knew it he felt his shirt being pulled up and over his head.

It seemed in the separation from her soft lips as his head leaned back against her headboard and watched her remove her top and became bare to him that it hit him – that he realized what he had been feeling. He was hit by the proverbial arrow as she gave him a lustful smile with her plump bottom lip caught between her teeth and her eyes were evergreen and sparkling like a Christmas tree.

Going against her frenzied kisses, Jax took control as he gave her a slow kiss before it somehow turned to desperation as he tasted her lips, her skin, her and it caused him to pull back abruptly.

"Delilah, wait," he panted. His pupils, like hers, fully dilated as he read her face.

He watched as her eyes contained a slight glare that was laced with bewilderment. She opened her mouth to say something, but it closed at the words that left his mouth.

"I love you," he extemporaneously blurted out.

Instead of feeling liberated as he expected panic seeped into his bones as Delilah looked at him with concern – fear.

Delilah shook her head, "No, no, no, don't say that," Delilah muttered as she immediately removed herself from his lap and went to cover herself. "You're only saying that because of the baby."

"Delilah," Jax called out as he got up from the bed, "I'm not saying that because of the baby."

"Yes, you are. You don't even know me," Delilah refuted angrily. She threw her shirt back on and he believed he could see tears lining her eyes.

She tried to make her way to leave the room, but Jax immediately blocked the door and rejection wasn't even on his radar. He didn't even feel the sting of it. He was just confused.

"Jax, move."

"No, you're going to talk to me and tell me why I can't love you and what the hell has been bothering you for the last few weeks." He demanded.

"There isn't anything to talk about Jax." She insisted.

"Do you love me?" Jax asked bluntly to her and he watched her face get a storm of immense sadness and her eyes began watering. Jax didn't know if she was going to answer, but he or she wasn't going to leave this room – this house – without some type of answer and explanation. He didn't understand how she didn't expect something like love to come into the equation especially when they were about to be raising a family together.

"I can't," Delilah finally replied in a tired and broken voice. Her hands covered her face as she was doing anything she could to hide her face.

"What the hell are you talking about you can't?"

"I watched how love ruins people Jax. How it crimples since the person becomes so infatuated with someone. I don't want to lose myself like that Jax."

Jax buried his head in his hands as he tried to wrap his mind around what the hell she was even trying to tell him, but it dawned on him the one person they haven't discussed in her life: her mother. "Is this about your mom? Is she who you have been thinking about?"

"I got a letter a few weeks ago," Delilah revealed.

Jax ran a hand down his chin as he tried to figure out what to tell her without sounding cliché or cheesy. They all knew Lily's story about how when Phillip went missing she tried to end it. She tried to end the pain of her husband just being gone. He remembered clearly how his mom would toss the words weak around about Lily since the accident. Yes, it was tragic that Phillip left her alone to raise Lip and Delilah by herself, but his mom said that should have given her more reason to live and not opted out, but he could see where the fear would be rooted in Delilah. She was her mother's daughter there would be characteristics that were bound to be passed down to her.