Changing My World

So close...

After overhearing those words....'we don't tell her...' I ran straight back up to my bedroom and started kicking the wall behind my bed in frustration. Can I seriously not trust anybody to tell me something I so desperately need to know?!!

Why won't anybody tell me? It's obviously something serious or they wouldn't be keeping it from me! It's also something bad, which is why they want to tell me after Halloween is over, not to destroy the fun for everybody else, as well as me probably.

I'm still kicking, harder and harder at the stupid wood that surrounds the bottom of the idiotic wall! My toes are beginning to get sore but i honestly care! I need to let it all out! It's making loads of noise and I don't care! Sweat began to brim on my brow as the emotions fizzled away inside of me.

"Hey hey what's the matter?" Asked Ryan worriedly as he swung the door open and barged into my bedroom. I carried on kicking the wall with both my hands held up against the wall near my head completely blanking him.

"Marie will you just stop you're going to hurt yourself!" He warned as he came behind me and snaked his arms round my waist before pulling me away from the wall to sit besides him on the bed. I just collapsed onto him in anger, frustration, tiredness and sadness. Why won't they tell me? This isn't fair!

"Marie calm down please.....what is wrong? Come on.....today is meant to be loads of fun..."

"Why is everybody keeping stuff from me then?!" I snapped, picking my head up from where it was hidden in my hands, to look him in the eye, he kept his arm round my waist.

"What are people keeping from you?"

"I don't know do I?! They are keeping it from me!!"

"Well how do you know they are keeping something from you then?" He was clearly also getting frustrated because I was so angry at the time, it was rubbing off on him.

"Because last night when Carmen and I came back they started talking about it, right in front of me! And, just now, I heard everybody in the lounge who was talking about not telling me something that I need to know downstairs...!"

"Wait wait, calm down please....you're really not making any sense"

I took a deep breath as he was right, I'm just so stressed.

"Look, all I know is that firstly, they all know what we are doing for Halloween, and secondly, Mike and Mai Lee are hiding something else that they said they will tell me after Halloween is over."

"Why can't you just wait until tomorrow then?"

"Because it's something important I know it is. And everybody else here knows what it is..."

"I don't."

"Well you're the only one who doesn't. Even Floss does so I'm surprised she hasn't told me, it really must be something extreme if Floss hasn't told me."

"Do you want me to try and find out for you?"

"You might as well. But I doubt you'll tell me even if you do get it out of someone"

"I will, I promise!" He held out his pinkie finger. We locked pinkies and then he gave me a massive cuddle. I've missed this, it's been ages.

"Soooooooooo......what are we doing tonight?"

"Still a surprise!"

"At least give me something!"

"Ok...um....you need to meet me, in costume, in the lobby at 6pm"

"Is that it?"

"Yep! Now, I'm going to go and talk to the others about whatever they are hiding from you. Give me 10 minutes then come find me. Where is everyone?"