I run to John and my apartment and grabbed a note from my room and started writing
John, when I met you I was kinda out of the world I wasn't in the place I am now, I love you so much I really really do but everything leads me back to matty, I'm sorry, I love you a lot but you will find better I swear. X the love of your life, Bella.
I run to my room again and packet my bags and run out of the door.
I walked to a restaurant and ordered my food.
--
I eat my food and payed and walked away.
I was going to matty, yes I was.
I called a taxi and jut thought he still lived at the same apartment from 3 years ago.
I walked into the elevator and looked at the time.
12am.
It's been 4 hours since I've seen John.
I saw Matty's door number and sighed.
This was it.
•Matty's pov•
I've had been crying and drinking, I wasn't drunk though.
John just walked away when she did too and I coudn't because George brought me inside.
I was on my bed just staring at the wall.
I finally realized that I wouldn't see her again.
I heared a knock on my door and walked to it.
I opened it.
"Bella?" I asked wiping my tears
"I love you" she said with tears in her eyes.
I kissed her.
I love her so so much is this a dream?
We broke away and I said she needed to come in.
"You got your stuff?" I smiled "I did, I love you way to much to leave you" she said nodding I nodded "it was hell without you Bella" I said wiping a tear away she nodded "you didnt really tryed to kill yourself did you?" She asked softly I looked at her "well, I did, but George stopped me" I whisperd the last part.
"Matty we are not leaving eachother again" she whisperd "I hope so" I smiled a little and walked to the couch "do you want to watch a movie, or take a bath, or sleep, or?" I asked she walked towards my direction a little "well I will go to your room and drop my stuff, take a shower and then watch a movie toghter?" She asked I nodded "take as much time as you need love" I said lighting a cigarette.
She nodded and walked off.
So when Bella and I broke up, it was literally a living hell, I wouldn't leave my room until night then I would go to a bar and drink my problem away, the whole day I would smoke weed and cigarettes and drink.
And do Coke also.
After a while my body coudn't handle it anymore and I started thinking, I coudn't live without the stuff so I thought about killing myself again...
I wanted to jump off this building where George and I live since 4-5 years ago.
I was that day the whole day at George's just being sad and a dick, and late that day I decided to jump.
So right when I wanted to do that George grabbed me and started to scream at me, but I blacked out because of everything.
After that I stopped my Coke addiction and went to rehab, I only drink but not as much, I smoke still, but only a little weed ones a week.
Still I was depressed every single day hoping she would come back and save me out of hell.
But then it hit me that she wouldn't come back and needed to get over her before it could get worse any moment again.
Well, I started to fuck other girls and stuff, but they weren't Bella so I wasn't happy.
Now I have her and I'm the happiest man alive.
"Hey I'm back" she smiled sitting next to me "hey love" I smiled she kissed my cheek "im glas you are back here" i whisperd "me too" she smiled a bit "so what movie?" She asked "uhmm,i dont know" he said "Well we could always do something else then watch a movie" she Smirked i laughed a bit she sat on my lap and i kissed her "i missed you" she smiled "i miss you more" i whisperd in the kiss.
--
Bella and I layed in bed.
She had her head on my chest.
"So there is this band playing in the centrum in London and I really want to go with you, it's a kinda festival" she spoke softly I nodded "sounds fun darling, we can go like at 5pm then eat something there at a restaurant then dance" I kissed her hair "that's a very good idea" she said "when is it?" I asked "in 2 days" she said I nodded "Sunday" I whisperd "matty" she whisperd "yes?" I asked "i love you" she said softy "i love you too" i hummed "im tired" she whisperd "im never tired of you" I whisperd she smiled and grabbed my hand "you know? I really like your old song" she said "witch one?" I asked "ghosts" she said "aah that's a very very old one" I laughed "I still like it, can you sing it?" She smiled "fine" I laughed "You, you always seem to get what you want" I started softly she moved her head on my chest again and closed her eyes
"Yo oh oh yo oh oh you seem to get better" I sang
"And I'm dreaming, you're bleeding, depleted
And I'm bouncing off the floor and your ceiling" I sang
"This feeling guess the meaning
You know oh oh you know oh oh you seem to get better
And I still lie outside" I sang softly
"Well this car moves faster than I'm ever gonna find you
Well this car moves faster than I'm ever gonna find you" I ended looking at her, she fell a sleep.
She looked so beautiful yet so unaware of it.
--
•Bella's pov•
I woke up seeing matty walking into the kitchen, I stood up pulled a shirt over my head and walked in the kitchen.
"Goodmorning love" matty said with a smirked and kissed my forehead "Goodmorning" I smiled "tomorrow is your day" he smiled I smiled "I'm really looking forward it" I said just then my phone rang I picked it up "hello?" I said "hey" John anwsered "uhm" I started but he cut me off "I'm sorry, I should of known that he was your ex boyfriend/ first love, I miss you like crazy but I'm happy for you, I'm not that ex that will stalks you because you don't want me anymore, I'm still here as s friend I love you, I'm happy that you and matty are back toghter" he said I stare at matty since it was on the speaker he looked at me "John I don't know what to say thank you so much" I said with a tear rolling down my cheek "hey it's no problem we were best friends in the first place" he said I nodded "yea yea ofcourse if you want to come and see me and matty sometimes it's fine" I said with a smile "and if you need any concert tickets you can call me" matty said lighting a cigarette "thanks mate" John said "well you can always call me it was nice to talk to you and see your okay" John said again "yea thank you John" I said with a smile "always" he said with a laugh
