I Act Like I'm Tough, He Treats Me Like A Teddy Bear

I Act Like I'm Tough, He Treats Me Like A Teddy Bear ; 16

Carson’s mouth was wide open, she looked like she was trying to catch flies. Josh was frozen, staring at me with his blue eyes wide. I was breathing a little faster than usual and I watched as they began to realize what I was saying. I watched their faces as they thought about all this. Without warning Carson burst into tears and flung herself at me hugging me fiercely. I was startled but hurried to return the hug.

“he, he, wants to kill you!” her voice was hysterical and very high pitched, if we weren’t in such a serious situation I might’ve laughed. But instead I hugged her and soothingly rubbed her back. I was scared but I couldn’t show it. I knew there was only one way to keep everyone safe and that was for me to leave.

Not to ever come back. I looked at Josh and saw sadness reflected in his eyes. I looked away afraid he’d be able to see what I was planning to do. I wanted one last night with him though, one more night before I’d leave. After I calmed Carson down she fell asleep. I stood there watching her, her face still reflecting the sadness and the grief I had poured onto her and I immediately felt guilty for doing that to her.

I looked over at Josh and walked to him taking his hand. We walked down the hall to his room and I snuggled onto his bed with him where we just lay there, holding onto each other like our lives depended on it.

It felt like we stayed that way for hours and I didn’t want to leave. Every moment I stayed longer than necessary I began to think about all the other things I could do, all the things I’d be loosing then I remembered I’d only succeed in getting them killed as well. That was the luck of being me. this always happened, why when everything was starting to get better did someone, have to ruin everything. One thing was for certain, I’d kill him before I let anything happen to Josh or Carson. If I was with Ami I would’ve done the same thing. Only I wasn’t and I started to cry as I realized again it was all my fault she was gone. It was my fault her smile wouldn’t be spread all over the place warming each person she directed it at.

He hugged me closer to him and I buried my face into his chest. Soon I felt his breathing slow and his grip slacken his arm falling back to his side. I wanted to kiss him but I carefully stood and wrote him a note, leaving it in his English textbook before I could leave. I left my assignment on love in there as well, the one I had re-written about him in fact. I wanted him to be able to keep apart of me even though I probably was going to die I was okay with that. I had accepted death a long time ago and would everything I could to save my friends.

I left then going to my room I left a note for Carson as well. I packed a duffle bag of the most warm and practical clothing I could get. I got my money stash which I kept hidden in a compartment on the side of the desk in the room. Carson didn’t know about it at all so I had thought it was a good place. I still had a good 10 grand in there so I pocketed a few hundred and placed the rest carefully away in a sock and placed it in the bag. Before I left I looked at the few picture frames I had and then took them and grabbed the pictures I had put in there. Josh had his arm around me and was looking at me adoringly I was looking back at him in the same fashion, the love we felt for each was clear on our features.

The sun was reflecting in the background in a way that lit us up. The second picture was of Ami, Carson and I. Josh took it the first day she was here, I’m glad he did, since she died practically the next day. I choked back more tears and smoothed my features. I grabbed my toothbrush and hair brush and a few hair elastics. I grabbed my cosmetics just in case I needed to have some way to disguise myself somehow. I’d have to find a way. So with that I head out, grabbing my sturdy dark leather coat and my gun and a few knives I had stashed around the room in places Carson wouldn’t find them.

Then I left, I walked out of the room I walked out of the dorm and started towards the school parking lot. I pulled out of the drive in my car, I had to knock out the guard at the gate and open the doors myself but that was alright, he’d be okay in about half an hour but I’d be long gone by then. I drove away from the school at double the speed limit. Trying to get away faster than I’d ever wanted to before, knowing I had two more lives depending on my actions I sped up and didn’t look back. When I stopped for gas later I took out the pictures and cried a little looking at Josh, Carson and Ami.

This was the only thing I could do about it, it was all I had to do and it was, I hope, enough to keep them alive, happy and long. I hoped.