Chapter 39: More Secrets to Share

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Some more secrets come to light for Meredith. Italics are song lyrics😏 (you might've already voted for this chapter...)

*tysm for 1k votes...it means so much to me that you guys enjoy this fic that much*

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(The next day after previous chapter)

Meredith had to tell him. She couldn't deceive him any more. He obviously wanted to get back together with her, which was just not right, or good, it was just wrong.

Great now she was mentally rambling!😔

She didn't understand what Derek saw in her. She was an ordinary plain girl. Her hair was always a mess, and she didn't have time to apply make up. She had a twisted sense of humor, which oddly only a few people understood. She was damaged good. Wait, not damaged goods, damaged bads. Meredith chastised herself. She needed to tell Derek ASAP, of all the things wrong with her.

The buttons on my phone are worn thin
I don't think that I knew the chaos I was getting in.
But I've broken all my promises to you
I've broken all my promises to you.

1) She just left Connor right? You think she just ran away? C'mon if you knew Meredith, you would know that she liked running away but she also she liked tequila and sleeping with inappropriate men. It was her 'thing'. Sleeping with her mom's employee was classified as inappropriate. So basically sleeping with her husband was sleeping with inappropriate men. Meredith [18] and Connor [28] got into a heated fight again. Connor instead of making Mer, go back to her room let her go out with her friends, he thought being nice to her would stop the incessant arguments. Sometimes he forgot she was just a teenager.

So she decided to pretty herself up. Being a trophy wife to a third year resident didn't give a girl  that many opportunity to dress up. She wore wore a dark purple dress with a safe neckline, not allowing view for cleavage. She chose her one of many diamond bracelet, courtesy of her hubby. She put her hair up into a suave yet sexy hairstyle. She called up Sadie and Lynn, some friends she met while she was wandering around Boston General Mall. She was a teenager, and yet she had no idea how to act like one. She spent all her childhood raising herself, and as soon as she was grown up, she "belonged" to Connor. They were meeting at the local bar, which didn't check for IDs. Meredith decided to live this night to the fullest because she knew tomorrow she and Connor would go back to fighting. After endlessly handling tequila, she forgot she was married and decided to screw the guy that had been eyeing her for the past hour.

This was reason #1 why, Derek couldn't be with Meredith. She was cheating, lying, filthy, unfaithful, whore who cheated on her husband.

A phrasing that's a single tear,
Is harder than I ever feared
And you were left feeling so alone.
Because these days aren't easy
Like they have been once before
These days aren't easy anymore.

2) After that, she told Connor, who rapidly got mad and slapped Meredith. He pushed her down onto the sofa, and made her do somethings...unwillingly. I'll spare you the gory details. But before Connor could fully assault Mer, she escaped and ran for her life. Only taking a couple pairs of sweatpants and shirts. She smartly took her wallet and cell phone. She camped out in Sadie's cousin apartment, which was a safe distance from the mansion Connor bought her. Meredith stayed with the cousin and her boyfriend until she was stable enough to go to Michigan, where she got excepted into a mediocre college.

Reason #2 she ran. Instead of facing her mother or Connor, she ran. If she and Derek got into a fight, she would've ran, instead of facing her problems head on.

I should have known this wasn't real
And fought it off and fought to feel
What matters most? Everything
That you feel while listening to every word that I sing.
I promise you I will bring you home
I will bring you home.

3) reason #3 Derek could've be with Meredith was because she was a full on slut. During the course of college she screwed so many guys, she was surprised she didn't get AIDS or STD. She drank and slept around. They called her 'Ready Meri', and she didn't take offense to that shameful nickname. She managed to get good grades and sobered herself up, and made acquaintances with the Chief of Mercy West. They graciously accepted her stellar-ness. Even then she had one night stands, endlessly until Alex asked her out on a date.

Reason #3, Meredith 'went around town' and she was shamefully aware of her slutiness.

You're driving me wild, wild, wild
You make my heart shake
Bend and break
But I can't turn away
And it's driving me wild
You're driving me wild

Why would Derek want to be with a girl like Meredith? He was clearly delusional. Meredith thought this was the perfect solution to make him never want her again. Even though it pained her to let go of Derek, in her eyes who the the perfect guy, she knew it was in his best interest is she let him go.

Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile because
You make it hard to breathe
Why do you do this to me?
To me, to me, to me

I used two songs.

Most of the verses were from the song "Why" by the Secondhand Serenade

The middle verse was by Troye Sivan in "Wild".

Now I think you know the full story of Mer and Connor. I will update shortly explaining the whole situation if y'all confused.

Rate this chapter and comment if you've ever heard any of these songs. Also comment songs that you want me to use in upcoming updates👻

20 votes...or no more updates for now😔😔 and 7 comments.

-Jiji😸

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