Get To You (Johlex Fanfic) *Complete*

Gone-20

Alex's p.o.v.

"Ok," he sighed. My heart dropped. Now way this was actually happening. It wasn't that I liked him but that he wouldn't own up. I was getting pushed around because of this and girls think of this as an invitation.

"Great. Now you guys need to stop talking about this. If I catch you, I'll make sure you're dealt with," she smirked and went back to her seat.

It was unbelievable how much power Jessica had. No one talked about it other than glaring and weird looks at me.

~

"You're awfully quiet Alex," mom looked at me. At dinner everyone was busy ignoring me. I didn't want to talk as they were all obviously mad at me.

"Let her. For once," Chrissy said picking at her food.

"What's going on?" Andrea asked. The silence was her answer.

"Alex can't keep her hands to herself," Nick said. This set me off. I stood up, knocking my chair down in the process and ran upstairs. I locked the door and fell on the floor.

Nick was supposed to protect me. No, he was right. If I had learned to keep my hands off Mr. Sykes then we would all be fine.

My legs were too weak for mw to get up so I crawled over to unser Nick's bed. I took my phone out and turned on the flashlight. I had nothing to lose now.

Perfectly set in the corner were a few bottles of alcohol. I got one and went to the restroom. This would make a mess. I layed down a small useless towel and sat with my back against the cupboard.

I opened the bottle and began drinking. The taste was terrible. Another swing. The liquid burned my throat as it went down. Last gulp. My head was spinning and I wanted to pass out.

I have to stay awake. I raised the bottle over my head and slammed it on the floor. The broken pieces were all on the towel. Clean up would be much easier this way.

I picked up a piece of glass and held my wrist out. Here goes nothing. I put it on my wrist and tears fell down my cheek. The feeling came back and I put the glass down. I have been clean for 3 years. It was terrible. If I do this I would regret it immediately.

"You can't cut yourself as a relief. When that razor cuts you it's causing more pain. Each cut is a new problem," Nicks advice came back to me. He was right. This wasn't going to help. I threw the broken glass away and threw the towel away.

I turned and opened the cupboard. An untouched box of hair dye and other needed materials. I took them out and began the process.

I looked in the mirror after it finished.  There she was again. 13 year old Alex. The girl that wanted her life to end. Scars ran down her thighs so her older brother wouldn't notice.

Now I'm 16. Yesterday was an amazing day. The best day. Everything seemed to change in the matter of 12 hours.

There was a knock on the door and I went to open it. Nick didn't look at me and pushed past. I saw him grab clothes.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"I'm sleeping in Johnnie's room," he answered still not glancing at me.

"Why?"

"Because he's hurt. I'm just making sure he doesn't hurt himself," he answered looking around.

"And I'm not hurt?" Tears were coming back out.

"I would hope not," he replied monotone.

"I almost went back to self harming. But you didn't ask," I tried to keep quiet. This was hurting a lot.

"Exactly," he shrugged. He gave up on looking for whatever and left. A new person came in.

"Alexandria, tell me what's going on," mom sat next to me on my bed. She would be understanding. Hopefully.

"I did something stupid," I said softly.

"What did you do?" She asked rubbing my back.

"I had sex with my teacher. More than once," I cried. She stopped rubbing my back and stood up. Boy was I wrong. My door closed and I was left alone. I cried out even harder.

Not even she said anything. I walked to the restroom and took out some pills. Nothing could hurt more and nothing would stop me. I closed the door and left it unlocked. If I wake up, someone cared. If this is my last breathe, I was gone for good and no one bothered with me.

It was an easy open. All pills were in my hand. Dave would've loved this. My tears blurred my vision and I wiped them off. The pills went in my mouth and I was gone.