Checkmate (Doctor Who fanfiction)

Psycho First

"I think that's not what my screen is telling me, Mister Lang," The Doctor told the man on the phone. I twirled my spinning chair in a circle. Craig, who'd just arrived (five and a half hours after he should've), stared at us like we each had grown a couple extra heads. "If that's your attitude, Mister Lang, please take your custom elsewhere." The Doctor hung up. "Hello, Craig. How are you feeling? Had some time to kill. I was curious. Never worked in an office. Never worked in anywhere."

"I'm here to keep him in check," I added.

"You're insane, the pair of you," Craig said plainly.

"Leave off the Doctor and Ruby, I love the them. He was brilliant in the planning meeting, and she caught an employee red handed this morning when they were stealing."

"He should've been more discreet about noise," I recalled. "A deaf bat could've heard him from Australia."

"You two went to the planning meeting?"

"Yes. I was your representative. We don't need Mister Lang any more, rude Mister Lang."

Craig blinked at me. "You caught a criminal?"

Sophie showed up with two plates of food before I could answer. "Here you go, and I found some custard creams," she said, handing The Doctor one plate and the other to me.

"Sophie, my hero," he said with a smile.

"Hi, Craig. I went on the web, applied for a wildlife charity thing. They said I could always start as a volunteer straight away. Should I... do it?"

"Yeah, great. Yeah, good. Go for it," he said breathlessly, not really into it at the moment. She backed off, looking kind of rejected.

"You go for it. About time," I told Sophie. "Craig, you look awful. Bed. Now. Go." I shooed him away.

"Who next? Oh, yes. Hello, Mister Joergensen. Can you hold? I have to eat a biscuit," The Doctor informed the customer over the phone.

***

We ventured into the flat. I was worn out from working for over eight hours, but The Doctor was up and running. A cat wandered down the stairs.

"Have you been upstairs? Yes?" The Doctor slowed down and sat down on the stairs, petting the cat. "You can do it. Show me what's up there," he murmured. The cat rubbed against his hand. "What's behind that door? Try to show me. Oh, but that doesn't make sense. Ever see anyone go up there? Lots of people? Good, good. What kind of people? People who never came back down. Oh, that's bad. That's very bad."

I folded my arms, raising my eyebrows at the pair.

"Get a room, you two," I teased. He stared at me, speechless.

Suddenly, the door to the kitchen opened. Craig stood there, still in uniform, looking fed up. "I can't take this anymore. I want you to go." Oh, what a surprise. Who else saw that coming from a mile away? The Doctor followed him into the parlor. Craig handed The Doctor the paper bag of cash.

"What've we done?" The Doctor demanded, tossing the bag behind him.

"For starters, talking to a cat!"

"Lots of people talk to cats!" The Doctor objected. Oh, this was going to be fun to watch. I cast a glance towards the kitchen, wondering if there was any popcorn over there.

"And everybody loves you, and you're better at football than me, and my job, and now Sophie's all oh, monkeys, monkeys! And then, there's that!" He swung open our bedroom door. Someone's been snooping then, I see.