Here's to the Heartache (Frerard) *Discontinued*

16: Get Ready - We're Going On A Feels Trip

Frank found himself in his own room on Sunday night, which had become an oddity as of late, seeing how he spent almost every evening with Gerard now, and even though Frank had managed just fine for the majority of his life being alone, he already missed Gerard's comforting presence beside him, he missed the sheets that smelled like him, he missed everything about Gerard, and he had just seen him yesterday, which made Frank feel slightly pathetic, but he was absolutely smitten, and he had given up trying to control his irrational desire to be around Gerard every second of every day by this point.

And really - Frank felt slightly guilty about the amount of time he had been whittling away with his newly acquired boyfriend; he had been neglecting his mother lately, he had been ignoring Pete, hell - he had even been leaving work early whenever possible so he could gain a few more hours with Gerard, but despite all that, it was worth it, because Frank was finally happy for the first time in two years, and even though he was being slightly irresponsible, he reasoned with himself that he deserved it after everything he had been subjugated to.

And although Frank had been expecting some negative consequences to come about because of this, they hadn't - not yet at least; Frank's mother seemed to be on an upswing, she hadn't experienced any odd fits lately, at least not that Frank had witnessed, and even though she had been slightly distant, and she tended to ignore Frank whenever he made an appearance at home, she had been going to work every day, and Frank actually walked in on her cooking herself some food this evening, which was a miracle in itself.

Frank was usually the one to do any sort of housework, including making meals for the both of them, but maybe Frank's absence was forcing his mother to pull herself out of whatever world she had wrapped around herself, maybe the person that she used to be was slowly remerging, and maybe she would start to be able to function on her own again if she was given enough time.

But Frank was a pessimist at heart, and no matter how perfect everything seemed right now, he was well aware that nothing lasted forever - especially good things. Frank had no idea how true that statement would prove to be in the future, and he was clueless to how drastically his life would change because of Gerard, but he did know that he had school in the morning, which was enough to put a damper on his thoughts for the time being.

And notwithstanding the fact that Frank was dreading school, and he had no friends - or even acquaintances to look forward to being reunited with, it wasn't the act of returning to the establishment that had Frank worrying his lower lip in-between his teeth - it was the wasted time, the lost moments that he could be spent doing something better, something with Gerard, because Frank knew that he would have much less freedom now that he had to add school to the stack of responsibilities he was already juggling haphazardly.

It also reminded Frank of his age, and of his lie, and of how much deception actually hung in-between his and Gerard's relationship, clogging the air with its intensity, and even though Frank was doing his best to live day by day, he couldn't completely obscure the nagging fear that he would suffocate on the condensed fumes emitting from both of their evasions, because Frank wasn't the only one with secrets, and Frank had a feeling that Gerard's were just as intense as his own, maybe not as morally wrong, but still dangerously important.

These thoughts were brought on by Pete unfortunately; Frank had actually invited him over earlier in an attempt to bridge the gap that had been growing between them because of Frank's distant attitude, even though his mother had taken a disliking to his best friend recently, Pete's overuse of eyeliner and punk style causing her to become wary of him, but she allowed his presence in their house because of his long standing bond with Frank.

Pete had brought up Gerard again of course, and at first, Frank had been more than willing to gush about the details of how Gerard had asked him to be his boyfriend, beaming from ear to ear the entire time, but instead of being ecstatic for Frank like he had expected, Pete had reacted suspiciously, grilling Frank on why he thought Gerard had taken this step with him so quickly, not to mention questioning if Frank was truly ready to be in a committed relationship with a much older man he still knew very little about.