The Regular Show X Reader

Bald Spot

~Reality~

Muscle Man sees a mirror and angrily breaks it with a chair. "Hey, that's my mirror!" Fives shouted. Muscle Man shakes him. "What am I gonna do, Fives?!" He asked. "Geez, relax! Starla's not gonna care, man." Fives said. "Are you kidding?! The only things I have going for me are my flowing mane and my rippling muscles." Muscle Man said. "Well, at least you still got your muscles." Fives said. "Yeah, I guess that's true." He takes off his shirt and flexes his pecs. Both him and Hi Five Ghost look in the mirror. "Man, you remember last summer at the water park?

I had to stop flexing 'cause Starla couldn't keep her hands off me. Whoa, whoa, I just thought of something." Muscle Man said. "What?" Fives asked. "If I keep flexing these babies, then maybe Starla won't notice I'm bald!" Muscle Man said. "Oh, yeah, that could work." Fives said. "Dude!" Muscle Man said. "Flex the pecs! Hoo!" The duo said, then they high five. A couple of random people are skating, as well as Mordecai skating with (Y/n). "Did you see that? I bet I could do that." Mordecai said. "Yeah, in your dreams." (Y/n) said. Eileen grabs Rigby. "Come on, Rigby. It'll be fun!" Rigby whimpers and holds onto the rail at the side.

"Should I help Elieen help Rigby?" (Y/n) asked in slight concern. Starla skates up to Hi Five Ghost. "Hey, Fives, have you seen Mitch?" She asked. "He should be here by now." Fives replied. Muscle Man comes out of the bathroom with a rose in his mouth, his pecs flexing all the while. "Dude, why does Muscle Man keep flexing his pecs like that?" Mordecai said. "I don't know, but it's disgusting." (Y/n) gags. "Happy anniversary, baby." Muscle Man said. "Oh, Mitch, you're such a charmer."

Muscle Man and Starla start skating. Starla laughs. "Mitch, will you lift me?" Starla asked. "Uh, sure, babe." Starla laughs again after he lifts her up. "Mitch." Starla said. Muscle Man laughs as his eye twitches. "Starla." He said. "Hey, babe, are you all right?" Starla asked. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be all right?" He replied. "Well, you look a little tired." Starla said. "What? No, I don't. I look normal. See?" He makes a weird face and tries to stop his pecs from flexing. "Hang on." He lets go of Starla. "Hey, where you going?" Starla asked. Muscle Man backs out of the rink. "I got to use it!" Muscle Man continues to back out into the restroom. He goes into one of the stalls, sits down and groans.

"My pecs are killing me. But it's only a little longer till they play our song. I just have to make it through that song!" He starts straining himself, and fails. He takes a deep breath and tries again. "Come on!" He starts flexing his pecs again. "Come on! Do it for her! STARLA!" Muscle Man shouted. Fives is socializing with a girl. "Yeah, I liked their first album." Starla skates over to them. "Fives, could you check on Mitch? He's been in the bathroom for a while." Starla said. "Sure."

Fives goes inside the bathroom, which looks a lot brighter than before. "Whoa." He said. "Who is that?! Get out of here!" Muscle Man shouted. "Muscle Man?" Fives asked. "Fives? Is that you?" Muscle Man asked. "Are you okay?" Fives asked. "Don't come in here, bro!" Fives opens the stall, and Muscle Man's pecs are shown to be flexing brightly and uncontrollably. Fives gasped. "Dude, what happened?!" He asked. "I was trying to keep flexing, so I started punching and slapping them and stuff, and now they're going crazy! They won't stop!" Muscle Man shouted.

"Well, dude, Starla's looking for you!" Fives said. "I can't go back out there, Fives!" Muscle Man shouted. "All right, boys and girls, it's your last chance to grab that special someone because it's the last song of the night!" The DJ shouted. "Oh, no! That's the song I requested!" Muscle Man shouted. "If you don't get out there and skate with Starla, it'll ruin your whole anniversary!" Muscle Man skates out of the bathroom. Starla turns her attention to him, and he salutes to the DJ, who nods. Muscle Man and Starla meet up. "Mitch! You remembered our song." She catches sight of Muscle Man's pecs and stares at them. "How could I ever forget?

You're the best thing that ever skated into my life. They both skate into the rink, past some skaters. The female skaters see Muscle Man's pecs and become hypnotized. They begin to skate toward him. Muscle Man and Starla continue to skate past more people. The females become hypnotized and skate toward them, leaving behind the males. "Hey, where you going, ladies?" A guy asked. "They just ditched us for that loser!" All the girl skaters are now skating a distance from Muscle Man and Starla.

They soon get close, grab Starla, and throw her aside. They scream excitedly at Muscle Man. "Huh?" Muscle Man is now crowded by all the female skaters in the rink. He tries to push himself out. "Get off of me!" Starla is enraged. "Aaah! Get your hands off my man!" She begins skating to the crowd, fighting her way through to Muscle Man. The three guys skate to him also. "Let's get our chicks back!" The third guy punches Muscle Man in the face, and pushes him over to the other guys, who surround him.

"If you think you can take our girlfriends, you got another thing coming!" The third guy grabs him while the second guy punches him. "I didn't take your girls!" He frees himself from the third guy's grasp and punches the second guy in the face. The first guy punches Muscle Man down. "Hold him still." The third guy hooks him by the shoulders. "Let go, bro!" Muscle Man said. "Let's see how strong those muscles really are!" He tries to punch him in one of the pecs, but it is spinning so rapidly that it slices off his hand causing him to scream.

One of the other guys try to punch Muscle Man, but he blocks it and punches him down. He then kicks the oncoming third guy down with his skates. The first guy trips over him while charging at Muscle Man, causing his face to hit against his pecs and burn. He drops down clutching it. "Oh, man! You burned my face!" A girl grabs onto Muscle Man and screams. "Aah! I love you!" Starla skates over to her. "Get off of him!" She throws her aside to the other girl skaters.

"Muscle Man!" The girl crashes into them. Another girl skater races to Muscle Man, but Starla holds her back. She turns to Muscle Man. "Mitch, why do you keep flexing your pecs?" She asked. " I..." Muscle Man gets grabbed by a guy skater. "Don't... know what you're talking about!" Starla smashes the skater down. "You're being weird!" Starla shouted. "No! You're being weird!" He flips the guy from behind and punches him. "Oh, whatever! That's just what you say when you're being weird!" She keeps fighting the other girl skaters.

"I'm not being weird!" A boy skater smacks Muscle Man in the face with a guitar. "Hey, watch the hair!" He shouted. "Mitch, don't you lie to me! Are you flexing your pecs because you want the other girls to notice you?" Starla asked. "No way, babe!" The skater kicks him, then Muscle Man punches him and jumps on him. "Aah!" A boy shouted. "Are you trying to break up with me?" Starla asked. "No!" The skaters grab him by the arms. "You are, aren't you?!" Starla asked.

"No, I'm not!" Muscle Man shouted. "Yes, you are! You're trying to break up with ME-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E!" As she holds that word, it causes a guy's cup to break and a guy's head to burst. "Baby, no! You're the only one I love!" Muscle Man shouted. "You're lying!" Starla shouted. "No, I'm not! I can't stop flexing my pecs, okay?!" Muscle Man asked. "What? Why not?" Starla asked. "I can't stop flexing my pecs because..." Muscle Man said. "Because what, Mitch?" Starla asked. "Because... I- I..." He strains a bit. "If you don't tell me right now, I'm gonna walk right out that door." Starla said.

"I can't stop flexing because... I didn't want you to know that I'm bald!" He bends his head down, revealing the bald spot. He stops flexing. A spotlight shines on Muscle Man, and the record is scratched by the DJ. All the girls who were stunned go back to normal. The skater guys let go of him. "You make me sick, baldy. Sick!" The skater guys go away. The girls skaters are sickened and leave the rink as well. "I can't believe he's bald." Starla skates over to Muscle Man.

"You hate me now, don't you?" He asked. "Aw, Mitch. I don't care that you have a bald spot. It happens to a lot of guys." Starla said. "So? I still look like an animal. A disgusting, middle-aged-looking animal." Starla said. "It's okay, Mitch. It's what's inside this disgusting, middle-aged-looking animal that counts." She looks at the bald spot and laughs. "What?" She feels the bald spot. "There's stubble on your head. You're not going bald. You just got a bad haircut." Starla said. "That's why I love you, baby." The two start making out, the friends watching and (Y/n) tries not to throw up. "Uh, so I guess we'll catch you guys later or something?" Mordecai asked. "Yeah let's go." (Y/n) said. They leave the two alone.