The Regular Show X Reader

Out of Commission

The trio are driving the golf cart in the park. They are jamming to music as they begin to laugh. "Aw, yeah. Listen to that engine purr! Thanks to the cart, we picked up this manure in record time." Rigby said. "Yeah, dude. With this cart, there's no lame job Benson can give us that we can't handle. Hey, speaking of jobs, we're late for the staff meeting." Mordecai said. "Punch it." (Y/n) said. Mordecai steps on the gas, and they yell excitedly. They drive up to Benson, who doesn't look happy. "Oh, look who decided to show up." He said sarcastically. "Sorry, Benson." The trio said.

They take their place on the steps. "As I was saying, I crunched the numbers and the park has extra money this year. (Y/n), Mordecai and Rigby, you can take this hunk of junk to the dump." Benson said. "Wuh?" The trio asked. "'Cause I bought us this." Benson shows them the Smarten Karten. "Ugh, what is that monstrosity?" (Y/n) asked. "Say guten tag to the Smarten Karten." Benson said. "Guten tag." Everyone jeers and heads to the new cart, much to (Y/n)'s,

Mordecai and Rigby's disappointment. "I think I'd rather say Auf Wiedersehen." (Y/n) said, and Benson rolls his eyes. "You speak German?" Rigby asked her. "I'm kind of fluent in it." (Y/n) replied. "Modern, sophisticated, powerful. These are three adjectives used to describe this miracle of German engineering." Benson said. "Whoa! This thing has 100 horsepower!" Skips said.

"A device that holds beverages." Pops laughs. Muscle Man gasps. "No way! A butt warmer!" He presses the 'seat warmer' button and relaxes. Pops laughs again. "Who needs all that stuff?" (Y/n) asked. The trio rush over to the old cart. "Here are a few words to describe the cart. Reliable, uh, classic..." Mordecai sniffs it and immediately becomes grossed out. "Won't smell like manure later." He said. "These seats are vintage simulated vinyl." Rigby said. "And look at these classic details." (Y/n) said. "Those are stickers." Benson said. "Dude, Benson, the cart's been at the park forever. It's like a member of the family." Mordecai said. "It's the ninth worker of the park." Rigby said. "That cart's engine is on its last legs. It's releasing noxious gas fumes into the air." Benson said.

"We're not taking Muscle Man to the dump and he releases noxious fumes all the time!" Rigby said, and (Y/n) tried so hard to keep herself from laughing. Hearing this makes Muscle Man try to charge at them, only for HFG to stop him. "No! He's not worth it." Fives said. "Guys, guys. I know you've had a lot of good times in that cart. But it's not cost effective. Who's gonna pay the bills for it?" Benson asked. "We'll pay 'em." Mordecai said. "Uh..." (Y/n) was about to tell him that that would be impossible, but Benson beat her to it. "So, you'll pay the gas bill." He said.

"Done." Mordecai said. "And the repair bills. Not to mention insurance, tags, and the occasional tetanus shot." Benson said, and Rigby scoffs. "Okay." Benson said. "Uh..." Mordecai said. Benson hands them lots of paper, and one of them has a total of 2,000 dollars. "$2,000?!" The duo asked in shock. "Yeah... golf carts are really expensive..." (Y/n) said. "That's right. Paid in full every month for the rest of your life." Benson said. "You've made your point." Mordecai said.

"Now take the cart to the dump by the end of the day or you're fired!" (Y/n), Mordecai and Rigby are parked up at the airport drinking sodas. They see an airplane come in. Mordecai sighs. "We'd better get going to the dump." He said. "It's not fair, man. It's not fair to the cart!" Rigby said. "Rigby, I love the cart too. But we can't afford to keep it." (Y/n) said. "Now let's pour one out on the hood, for old cart's sake." Mordecai said. "Word." He agreed. They shed tears and pour soda on the cart. it goes through the engine, causing it to electrocute. "Huh?" The trio asked.

They jump out and back away as the cart appears to come to life. "Woah." It moves around a little. "Is this what it's like to be conscious?" The cart asked, and the trio is stunned. "Wait a second, you're alive now?!... you know what, at this point, I'm not even surprised." (Y/n) said. "How is this possible?" Mordecai asked. Rigby looks at the soda. It is called "Thunder Jolt X: 10x the Caffeine". "Woah." Rigby said. "What else can soda do? First it created a future band version of ourselves, and now this?" (Y/n) asked in disbelief. Rigby's eyes widen at the mention of that.