enemy to doctor - the hating game

25 - preparations...

"Come in."

The door opens and Patrick enters. He is dressed in normal day casual clothes, a jeans and expensive looking sweater. He has to be beyond rich with a clinic like this. I just wonder why there's nobody else here at the moment.

"Hey Lucy, doing fine?", he starts walking over and places a big medical bag on the counter underneath the cabinet.

"Yes, no pain."

His hands stop moving over the zipper of the bag and he turns to look at me.

"Health isn't all about whether you're in a physically good state. It's also about the mental aspect."
His words sound scolding but the soft tone that flows with them gives me reassurance.

"I know.", I sit up and brush some strands of hair behind my ears. "I am nervous, there's no doubting that. But I'm also kind off relieved."

Almost automatically my eyes shoot to Josh who is standing just a few feet away.
I hope that he knows how big of a part he plays in the word "relieved".

"Glad to hear that. It is 2 pm right now and I think we can do the procedure at 5. I have a friend of mine coming for the anesthesia and to also assist. So we're going to be 3 during the procedure.", he turns around with his stethoscope hanging from his neck.
"For now, I will do an overall check-up on you as it's required for the pre-surgical part. And of course a more thorough one after the surgery."

I swallow down the little lump in my throat and nod at him. He walks over with a bunch of stuff in his hands that I quickly divert my eyes from.
Josh doesn't say a word when Patrick takes my hand and clamps the little device onto my finger. He simply leans against the wall, his arms crossed in front of his chest and watches as Patrick carefully places the pulse measurer around my upper arm. Then he starts to pump it up and ultimately places the stethoscope right underneath the sling while watching his watch.
A minutes passes until he removes it.

"Pulse is fine. Oxygen levels-", he takes of the little device "lower limit of alright. But it should naturally rise soon. Let's check heart and lungs. Josh, you mind helping her up?"

Seconds later Josh sits down next to me and helps me with lifting myself and then the shirt I'm wearing.

"Thank you. This might be a little cold...", his fingers move under my shirt and the metal presses onto my upper chest. "Please take a total of five deep breaths in, hold them for a little and then let them out nice and slow."

I do as told and Patrick occasionally repositions the metal bell. Then Josh moves to hold me from the front and Patrick has the opportunity to listen to my lungs from my back. It all goes pretty quick and I'm happy to lay back into the comfortable cushions behind my back.

"I will now check ears and nose. Super easy, super quick."

Patrick slides on a pair of gloves and grabs one of those little inspection devices, I think they're called otoscopes.
I don't like them, never did.
I tense at the sight of him bringing it into my vision and he notices immediately.

"I'll just look. It's required and won't hurt or be uncomfortable. I promise."

He doesn't wait for an answer and lays a hand onto my chin to tilt it backwards. Within seconds he is done with checking my nose and carefully turns my head sideways to do the same with my ears.

„Alright, all set. You're doing great. Josh, can you take off the bandaging? I'll check the stitches and clean it up."

Josh immediately jumps into action and retrieves a pair of scissors from a drawer.

„Yes, on it. You should maybe check her concussion. She hit her head again earlier. Not harshly but it did cause her pain."

Patrick turns to face me again and his eyebrows fly up, probably wondering how I managed to do that.
Well, it's a complicated story for another time to tell.

„Sure.", he fumbles his phone out and turns on the flash light. He does the same little test as Josh did, bringing the light closer to my face and backing away again until i close my eyes from the exhaustion of focusing on the light.

"Still concussed, definitely. But that's nothing severe. You won't be able to do sports anyway within the next weeks and please don't drink alcohol for the time your on pain medication and the daily injections for blood circulation."

He stands back up and takes a piece of paper from the table to write something down on it.

"Wasn't planing on", I joke and look at Josh who is approaching and sitting down next to me on the bed while Patrick checks something on his phone and writes a few further things down.

"I'm going to remove the bandaging okay?"

I give him a little smile and nod.

He pulls the blanket down, my shirt up and simply cuts through the bandaging, pulls it out from underneath my body and throws it away.
I know better this time than looking down at it.

"Don't look. There's some dried blood around the edges and it all looks pretty fresh. But it's already healing so you're definitely on a good way."

My eyes are glued to the ceiling and I keep them there.

"I'm going to very lightly push down on a few spots and you tell me if it hurts, alright?"

Dread fills my stomach but I simply nod again and brace for impending pain.
Gloved fingers gently push down on the edges of the scar on the sides of my stomach and I tense.

"Try not to tense. I'll be careful, promise. Just continue breathing. Does this hurt?"

His fingers brush a slightly more sensitive spot right underneath my navel and I wince.

"Very uncomfortable but", I breathe out a shuddering breath "bearable."

"Alright. That's normal, I'm almost done. Tell me when something gets more than uncomfortable."

"Yes."

I'm tempted to look down at whatever he is doing but again, I know better.
An uncomfortable sterile smell has already spread through the room and I feel myself struggling with the nausea it evokes.
I close my eyes and focus on something else, I try to remember the typical smell of my childhood. The smell of fresh strawberries on our farm and the taste of the strawberry cake my mum always made.
I definitely have to go home once I can.
Once I'm all healed.
Josh's examination passes fast and relatively easily.
Then he switches spots with Patrick who holds a small metal tray.

"I'll clean the blood off and disinfect the area overall. It's going to be uncomfortable but I'm sure you can manage without the pain sedatives. Just relax the muscles and you'll be all fine."

Josh gets up and sits right next to me, then grabs ahold of my hand and brushes a few strands of hair back.

"Nothing you can't manage. We'll do this everyday to prevent infections, okay? If it hurts, squeeze my hand. Just breathe."

I steady my breathing rhythm and try to loose myself inside of his dark blue eyes.
Patrick starts.
And there's a lot of hand squeezing.

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